The Lyon Family in Brazil

Life on the Edge

2012-02-10T03:23:00.001-08:00

We were a bit afraid my last blog seemed a bit whiny to people. It is just that life on the edge of the world can be hard but God’s grace is so much bigger. I was just wanting to illustrate how without it the challenges would drive us back the the US. Because of grace this is home.

That is the wonderful thing. Through the many challenges this becomes more home. Through the good times this becomes home. All the experiences we have here good and bad begin to build a new history. The reason Oregon, the US hangs on as home for so long is the history you have there. I wrote about some of the hard things then we had a couple weeks of the good.

The last 10 days have seemed like a month. First I finished the roof I was building. They seemed much more blessed and it really brought Fabio out of his shell. I wish I had a magic cure for the damage done by sin but it isn’t magic. It is God’s grace applied on lives and He goes about it gently and slowly. That we might learn and be able to apply it to others. I don’t know what abuse Fabio faced to be so repressed. To give him the maturity of a 12 year old when he is 18 but I know time, love, patience and above else the Word of God can open him up, God wants to make him a new creation.

Also Melissa had the neighborhood girls come over for a bible story, snack and some games. It was fun to see them interact but man, it is harder to keep kids organized in your house. They just have never had structure. One of the big needs is to just teach discipline, structure, obedience of rules. Many groups have came through, there are pastors here, many of these kids have heard the gospel and have prayed prayers. Getting people to take the time to get close and teach them how to live is always the hard part.

Why is that necessary? Why is that worth your dollars? Why is that worth our family living here on the edge of the world?

Our neighbor was 9 months pregnant and had never went in for prenatal care. Medicine is free here. The public system is slower and more crowded but if you have no job it is still good and you have time to waste. The problem is it is inconvenient and you don’t see the need. Why take a taxi or the bus to go wait in line when you could just sit home and wait? She didn’t know she had preclampcia and ended up going into cardiac arrest and quit breathing. Her boyfriend had to pull her tounge out of her throat and give her mouth to mouth. She went to the hospital after being revived and had an emergency c section. A few days later she came home.

She had been prescribed medicine for both her and the baby but again it is work to go get it. So she didn’t. Melissa was holding the baby and noticed he had a fever. She commented on it and began praying. The adult daughter of the boyfriend was there and convinced them to take the baby in. The baby ended up in the hospital a few more days and the mom was at home. Melissa was down there visiting them that night and I went down to check on them. They were nervous, scared and weren’t too sure of anything. I prayed for them and the baby in Portuguese. I encouraged them to trust God and that he cared about Joao as much as them. Kayla the mom seemed a bit more at peace and we left them to rest.

Joao ended up making it through the fever and getting to come home a few days later. What a joy to see Melissa holding him and Kayla smiling. To see Alannah’s big eyes looking at the little guy. Kayla's 2 and 3 year old still run naked in the streets, still need some education but at least Joao will have the opportunity to run naked too.

Also this week Kayla’s brother brought someone to the gate and called Melissa. I am the big meanie that says no to everything so they always try for the sucker. They wanted to sell us their blanket. It happened to be well over 90 and was almost 10 at night. I didn’t mean to but I laughed. I couldn’t imagine buying a blanket. I felt bad right away as they left discouraged. Obviously they needed something. After I went to bed and realized I wasn’t going to sleep I walked down the street and called Wallace. I asked what she really needed. He told me school supplies so her son could go to school but that an aunt agreed to buy them. I told him if they had used furniture to sell or found some I would help them refinish them for sell and left.

I told Melissa what they needed and she told me the kids of the worst mother on the street don’t go to school because they don’t have the supplies. You need a uniform, pants, lots of notebooks and pencils. The mother may be a prostitute because the 13 year old boy tries to take care of the girls 8,7 and 2. She is never home and always dressed to party. I have compassion on her too but am very frustrated for those little girls. They jump up on any table, block of concrete, grab poles and dance like strippers at the drop of a hat.

I couldn’t sleep thinking of those kids repeating the life of the mother. What chance do they have an a nation so rapidly growing. Growing more expensive and more globally competitive. If they don’t go to school they are doomed to stay in the dark ages while the nation around them buys big TVs, cars and all sorts of newly available toys. Brazil is a rich nation where 30% of the population lives in absolute poverty. I was really bothered, with school it is hard to climb out of that without it is impossible.

I had coffee yesterday with our Pastor here. Altair told me the moms can go to the school and register them and ask for assistance. There is a way for any kid to go to school and get an education but the mom has to do some work. That is why we are here. The kids, the moms, the ones who are willing to change need to be taught the biblical importance and disciplines that can lead to changed lives, to changed family histories. These kids will grow up to reproduce. Either reproduce poverty or reproduce believers. It is not about the amount of money but about the mindset. Only the power of God’s word can change the mindset.

Be praying for us and whether God might want you to join us. We are living ok. We still need many things that cost a lot here but they will come over time. What we are short is the extra funds to bank roll ministry. To buy materials for the kids on the street. To buy wood for projects to teach kids how to build furniture. We need a bit more personally to buy a medical plan for our family but really we just want to grow in effectiveness. We have time, we are here, we aren’t short money for food or bills. We would like to take on more projects like the roof. You can donate once or sign up for monthly below.

http://shepsstaff.org/lyon.aspx

Also we need to visit the states. We both have Grandparents that are ageing and would like to meet Alannah. We need to visit our church. We need to broaden our support base and we need to rest. It is going to take a good chunk of money, around 10k for airfare and some more for travel in the US. My parents are donating a car they bought here that I should be able to sell for about 5k. Pray about giving as they would like to see this function as a kind of matching gift. We plan to be in the states July 2nd – Sept 2nd. We need to firm this up and buy tickets in March. It is very important. If you want to take part in this email me at lblyon@yahoo.com and let me know. I will be making information available on how to designate for a special fund.

Thanks and God bless you all.

Life on the Edge

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

DOWNLOAD ALL

Not heroes just by the grace of God

2012-01-31T13:02:00.001-08:00

Luke 9:23And he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. 24For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it. 25For what does it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses or forfeits himself? 26For whoever is ashamed of me and of my words, of him will the Son of Man be ashamed when he comes in his glory and the glory of the Father and of the holy angels. 27But I tell you truly, there are some standing here who will not taste death until they see the kingdom of God.”

Today I had the joy of building the frame for a new roof over a lady’s out door kitchen area. It was hot today but I enjoyed working removing the broken tiles and sticks that were currently up there. I enjoyed the joys on their faces when they looked at some of my American tools and couldn’t believe how fast they were. I enjoyed showing Fabio her son how to use a few things and what they were for. I enjoyed having him help. I was feeling good doing a job not only for free but where I bought a fair share of the materials for someone. I was thinking what a joy it is to be a missionary. Then I decided to help her more and ask her about cleaning our house a couple times a month. She has nothing, doesn’t understand many things, I am building her a roof and my friend Roberto is sorting out her utilities. She responds by trying to gouge me for a quick buck on the cleaning. She looked at me like an American with too much money and shot me a price three times normal with a smile on her face. Not only was her price high she has no transportation and I would have to pick her up an take her home. Thanks lady , but no thanks.

On top of that frustration I am afraid I have high blood pressure and have long had hypoglycemia. I didn’t eat this morning because nothing here is quick or easy. I got overheated, lost some hearing in my left ear and felt dizzy. I worked to get to a stopping point. My shirt and shorts were so sweaty it looked like I had just jumped in the river. Without even a little exaggeration I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to get myself home. I got my tools got in the car hoping to get to the house and have Melissa’s help.

When I was driving up I see the whole family walking and the baby not looking too good. She was in Melissa’s arms and when I asked what was going on, she was going to walk a half mile to the doctor because of something with Alannah’s eye. Keep in mind I am barely able to drive or think. Alannah has a hard time living here. I start to get a bit worried. She is covered in bug bites, so are we, she is constantly covered in heat rash and has trouble with asthma.

I got them in the car, drove to the house to grab water and a shirt. I couldn’t have put mine back on if I wanted to, it was soaked and covered with sawdust. I also know I very much should have been going to a doctor, my ears weren't ringing yet but they were plugged and I was still dizzy. I grabbed ice water and jumped into a 15 second cold shower then got back in the car.

At that moment I no longer wanted to be a missionary. I wanted to be back in Oregon ignoring my health there. Miraculously it really was only a surface desire. Inside I knew I still wanted to be here driving to the hospital to get Alannah checked out again. Listening to her cry and trying to stop her from rubbing her eye. Even when we got to the emergency room and the fat, lazy un-kept “doctor” came in there was an acceptance that this is the price of the gospel. In fact death was paid for all of us.

He didn’t even look at her and told us to go to the eye hospital. Gave us a note to get us treated there. We were there with a baby that has a rash, is pale and has a swollen eye and he didn’t even look.

We headed off to find the eye hospital, luckily Daniel and Juliah had spotted it on our way to the emergency room. We got there to be told they were at lunch and come back at one. We got to the gas station, got home, got the other kids unloaded, I got a real shower and headed back.

The doctor was much nicer and the place was clean. They couldn’t find the problem but gave her some anti inflammatory drops. She still doesn’t look good but has her eye half way open and is watching TV.

After we got back home the guy came to repair my freezer. He missed seeing that he needed a special tool yesterday and now wants more money for the job but since I agreed to a second repair he will honor the original price.

We miss our family. We miss our culture. There is no fast food here. No movie theatre, no shopping mall. We are struggling to both love and reach the neighbor kids and yet teach them to respect us. They call our kids liars and don’t respect what anyone says but me. It’s frustrating, hot and the mosquitos are eating us.

Maybe I almost begin to understand what it means to take up a cross. I know there are people who have paid much higher prices. We aren’t heroes, we are fairly comfortable. We have a decent house, good food, a TV on the wall, satellite, movies and friends. I only think I am suffering because I love me so much.

Walking to the little store down the street I began to reflect on taking up your cross. There is a price to see peoples lives touched by the Lord wherever you are. The price is a bit of your life. That is what it means to loose it. It is no longer mine it is His. I can’t leave just because it is hard for Alannah to live here. Jesus who carried his own cross knows. He loves her more then me. He also loves the neighbor kids who spend 12 hours a day at our gate yelling for us to come out.

Right now we are finally starting to see real fruit, real opportunities for long term ministry. We seen a sprinkling of it in Foz with the kids in the favela but there was a sense that it was only a glimpse of the future. It didn’t feel established or quite real. Here there is a joy in seeing a plan come together. In writing an email to our leaders laying out goals, plans and dreams. Things are opening up and I feel like a missionary. I understand and accept my role. I even accept the pain it costs to be here. That doesn’t mean it’s easy. My flesh has no desire to post this. My flesh wants to leave for Campo Grande tomorrow or next weekend and see a movie, eat subway or burger king. My flesh wants to be fed.

How will I respond. I will get up earlier and be in the word longer. Try and be more prepared to view all the things that happened above as an opportunity for a little of the cross to be rubbed off of me and onto them.

Getting busy

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

DOWNLOAD ALL

What do they need, can I offer it?

2012-01-17T09:00:00.001-08:00

As we have lived in Brazil the last year and a half we have often wondered what is our job? Missionary is a big title, it covers a lot of ground. At times it can be evangelist, at times pastor, at times a farm worker, contractor, cook or even a parent. It isn’t as simple as a daily list of chores or punching the clock. You have to be a constant observer and learner.

The resolution I am coming to is that my job is to look at the people I am around and prayerfully attempt to asses their needs. Spiritually and physically. As we observe we also have to keep in mind our own ability to meet those needs. The people may need a hospital or a doctor, that may not be a need I am able to meet. We also have to look at whether God is calling us to meet that need. For instance the church here tends towards legalism. It is not my job to change the culture of the local church even though the people need to know grace.

Here in our neighborhood people need dentists, education and but much more they need discipline. Realy that is true of much of this city and much of Brazil. I would love to teach an in depth bible study. To open a church. To sit in comfortable living rooms. However God has led us to Corumba. Corumba has churches, has church leaders, has pastors and is even sending a few missionaries. What I see that is lacking is discipleship. Often people are believers but have not been led to maturity in their faith. The reality in a catholic country is that very few would deny that Christ exists, that he is God, and that he died on the cross. The biggest problem with the application of the catholic faith here is that they leave him on the cross.

I am not sure really where the line is between saved and unsaved. I personally don’t believe it is a simple prayer, though I still often use that. I believe it is much more simple than that but sometimes more genuine. There is no doubt in my mind that someone can pray a prayer in a moment of genuine confession that winds up commemorating the beginnings of their walk with Christ. There is also no doubt in my mind it could be a few words spoken in a moment of guilt without really giving place to Jesus to be Lord of our life. That is more the experience I see around me. People who have muttered words, been to a service or two but Jesus simply has no more place in their lives then a bumper sticker. Thankfully that is for God to sort out.

In the meantime it is clear to me walking with Christ is about learning to read and obey His word. That starts with me. Am I giving the word of God a life changing place in my life? Is my day marked by giving first priority of the day to a time in the word? In all honesty the last couple of weeks have been marked by much distraction. Trying t get back on task after Christmas has led to a bit of rushing out the door. I am first called to keep this straight.

After me, am I modeling and discipling submission to Christ to my wife and kids? Are Melissa and I together giving effort to seek Him jointly, to be ruled by and live in the Spirit? I see many signs that the kids understand why we are here. They seem to be grasping the task at hand. Juliah last night asked what happened to people who die and don’t know Jesus. I told her they go to hell. She responded with a simple that’s sad. It was so clear.

That is something we always need to remember. All of us. The people around us are very much in a sad state. They are more than likely damned, thankfully God is even more interested in changing that state then me. It wont all depend on us but we may well be able to be a part of it.

After that, if the person does have a saving faith, do they understand? Do they understand the joy of serving Jesus? Did they simply respond to him because someone preached eternal doom, because someone loved them, because they wanted to have peace and joy? Did anyone stay and explain to them that God’s word was given that we could experience life? That obedience is the key to receiving the promises of God?

I believe the streets here are full of people who need to be shown what a life of obedience looks like more then they need to pray a prayer. I believe I need to look at how to spend time interacting with people in a life on life format.

Currently Melissa spends a lot of time with the neighbors. Lots of women and kids. Loving them, being around them. She is looking to start volunteering at a hospital in Bolivia, we are leaving to go there in a bit. I am spending time helping on a little farm. We are having one boy who is 18 but acts about 12 help us. He has had a hard abused life. I believe he will be impacted just by being around Roberto and I. I am ordering materials right after this to build a new roof over his mothers outdoor cooking area. We are leaving to go to the river this weekend to minister again in Porto Esperanca.

God uses the time we spend next to people visiting, working, playing and sometimes even preaching is effective.

Draining in a different way

2012-01-10T06:27:00.001-08:00

Having grown up on a farm and owned a business I understand being tired. Melissa and I both have been through long tiring seasons. In our business, our marriage, our family, our personal lives we have seen stressed and tired states. What I am finding is that life as missionaries is pretty easy compared to the grind of chasing dollars. We don’t have a normal, uninteresting routine to wake up too. Our weeks and days all look different. Much of our “job” is about building relationships. A friend and supporter joked with me before we left that I was becoming a professional socializer. It was funny and meant in fun but also largely true. Our job is to meet people and get involved in their lives.

At the same time as this makes our lives more interesting, more pleasurable if you will we have begun to see signs of the toll being a missionary can take. It isn’t that we are doing bad or that we are completely wore out. It is the little things, being more edgy with each other, quicker to frustration things like that. For the most part it is small things.

For me personally it is a little deeper. I happened t learn Portuguese a bit quicker and being the husband it has been my job to take care of the paper work with immigrating to Brazil, locating housing, negotiating, going out to pay bills. These things are normal but in a new culture where you don’t understand how to do things, often struggle with the language it is tiring.

During Christmas we went on a mini vacation with my parents who happen to be in Brazil. The had helped us move in November then went on to their duties with Calvary Chapel. They flew to Campo Grande and we picked them up, drove the 5 hours back home only to arrive home to a brownout and insufficient power to turn on our lights or to get our fans moving. Eventually I tightened all the breakers in the box and got sufficient power to run the fans. A couple hours later a storm blew in and it got cold (70) and we all regretted having the fans on.

Christmas

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

DOWNLOAD ALL

The next day we opened presents then went to a resort on the other side of the border in Bolivia. It was a real nice time there, followed up by a nice trip to a little town called Bonito. Bonito has a lot of little rivers with real clear water. You can snorkel and see a lot of big fish. We finished it off in Campo Grande where they have movie theatres, shopping malls and American fast food. We ate McDonalds, Burger King and Pizza Hutt. It was a great week.

The thing is I came home more tired and less refreshed. The other side of the vacation is asking questions in Portuguese, trying to find hotels, looking for places. It is little normal things but I find I am struggling to get refreshed. I love being here and am planning to work with Roberto to start kind of a boy scout program. We want to build a canoe with some boys, camp, build fires, and that kind of thing.

Melissa is wanting to start volunteering in Bolivia at the hospital and we plan to spend some time on the river alone as a family. God is certainly continuing to open doors and lead us.

What I am seeing is the need to visit the US. To spend time in our home church. To visit with supporters. To regroup, refresh and come back re-energized for another couple years.

Pray for us as we get a footing in ministry here in Corumba. We have gotten a start in Port Esperanca and our neighborhood. We want to see a couple more things get established. A better daily routine, Melissa going to Bolivia a couple times a week, and perhaps a boys club. Pray that we hear from God on Kids schooling and the timing for us to go to the US. The kids schooling has gotten more complicated then we thought it would be. There is a lot of bureaucracy here and we need to get a lot of paperwork to have them in school here. For homeschooling with English Material we would be behind because we had chose to put them in public school in Foz. Somehow that didn’t result in them having the right paper work to re-enter school here and we are not convinced that is the right thing. This is an example of how life here can be draining. Lots of un-educated decisions to be made.

Weekend on the River

2011-12-19T06:14:00.001-08:00

Our family got the opportunity to go out to Porto Esperanca this last weekend. http://g.co/maps/njpz3 The rains have started and it is no longer accessible by car so we met a boat at a bridge not to far from the town. It happens to be a little village a ways out of Corumba. Depending on your boat, if you drive a bit and meet a boat it is any where from 3 to 8 hours away. We happen to be praying about moving there at some point in the next year. It is still a part of Corumba and the pantanal but it would definitely be a change in lifestyle. People there make a trip to Corumba once a month to buy all the food they can’t harvest from the river or local trees and pay any bills they may have. It has a small school and there is a mine there that offers first aid. There is a military post about 20 minutes by boat that has ambulances about 40 minutes from Corumba. This was the first experiment to see how the family would do on the River. It was awesome, during the day anyhow. Night, just a bit scary.

While there we seen a 7 or 8 foot alligator, tons of parrots, parakeets other birds, giant otters, capybara, the pastor and another guy seen a big snake, frogs, bats, fish, just a seemingly endless supply of animals. I got the opportunity to preach Saturday night. The way the villages work is that when someone is able to be there they a service and someone preaches, someone does worship, someone does Sunday school. It reminds me of stories of the old circuit preachers. Any how as I was preparing to try my hand at preaching in Portuguese, with no English speakers available, I was reading Genesis 1. How amazing to read the story of creation in somewhere that is surely a glimpse at the garden of Eden. Sitting in cities or towns where everything is buildings, concrete and shopping malls creation can loose its marvel. It can be easy to wonder if it matters how it came to be. Easy to think maybe God used evolution, maybe it only matters that you believe in God but don’t have to literally believe in the account in Genesis. I agree to be saved that probably isn’t important but sitting in that location looking at the incredible diversity around me I can only attribute it to God. The thing that really struck me was the separation of water and air, land and water, the abundance of plants, animals and fish that God put on earth. Genesis 1 describes the Pantanal. You all really need to come see it.

I managed to get through the preaching time ok. Pastor Altair, Andre and Rodrigo all encouraged me that it made sense and people understood. They seemed genuinely encouraging that it went well. Praise God. I prayed a lot that afternoon. I am not really someone who plans word for word what I will say and memorizes it. I need to interact with the crowd, respond, flow freely. It is who I am. If I was the other it would be easier, I could write it out in Portuguese, confirm it with someone and memorize it. It really felt like a confirmation that we are to spend more time on the river, perhaps live there and go out to other villages to do services. This will require a boat. I have one I am praying about.

On our way home Moriah said to us I really didn’t want to go out there and visit. I asked what she thought now. She said she liked it. I asked if she would want to live there, her eyes lit up and she said a big “that would be so cool”. We will see. I had to go under the church to get my hammock down in the dark. We were short a mattress and I needed to put it up in the church. I was so scared I was going to get bit by a snake. They are very plentiful and it wasn’t an unwarranted fear. Here in Brazil people always stay places late into the night. There as soon as it gets a little dark the locals bolt for home. Last time we were there one of the guys who stayed a little late had a poisonous snake try and bite him as he went up the ramp to his house. Him and his wife had to go out with lights to hunt it. His wife ended up killing it. People there are tuff. Douglas a boy Altair and I got to talk with had wounds from a knife fight that were still healing. There I found myself in pitch black under the church trying to reach up and untie a hammock. The next morning a snake got chased from the bottom of the ramp, where I was, to the river.

Sunday morning we had another little service, Altair shared, even referred to some of what I shared the night before, so apparently at least some of it got through. Then we all went down to the river for a baptism. It was beautiful.

Our kids did awesome. We loved it. We are praying. We looked at a house for sell there for about 12k dollars. I have to say we really need prayer. This wouldn’t be a little step or one to take lightly but this is where the need is. The people need disciple. Other villages need reached. I as a missionary need to be willing to go where the need is, where the average person in the church can’t easily go. Once a month isn’t enough time to disciple the young Christians. The boys end up alcoholics, the girls, many of them work as prostitutes and strippers during the fishing/tourism season. Lots of women and kids came to church, few men. To stand in the gap for those girls, for those boys someone has to go live there. Teach them love them. Lead them to go out to the others. Why not us?

The house for 12k

Anyhow, be praying. We will probably be sending out another letter soon with information on a house fund and probably a boat fund. In the mean time if you want to begin monthly support you can do it here.

http://shepsstaff.org/lyon.aspx

It was awesome

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

DOWNLOAD ALL

Really this was probably the best time we have had in Brazil. Our whole family was engaged in the ministry. Melissa helped with kids and food, I preached, the kids served and interacted, we visited homes. It was truly beautiful.

We might…

2011-12-12T07:52:00.001-08:00

Last Saturday night we went to a party at one of our neighbor’s house. It was kind of a baby shower. Luckily there were no stupid games in sight so I stuck around. It was such a simple house, we were sitting out front on simple chairs in the dirt yard. Lots of kids, a few neighbors and later on some of their family from in the town showed up. One of the couples that showed up just looked like they didn’t belong. Obviously family that had some how ended up middle class instead of living in the shack next door. Their apparent discomfort with the location got me thinking, especially when the food came out.

Growing up in the United States we are so fearful of food, water, people, new areas. We fear the mights. If you eat that you might get sick, if you drink that you might get sick, if you go there you might get robbed. This meat might have gone bad we better throw it out. Living here I have had to start dealing more with the probable and less with the maybes. You probably won’t get sick and you very likely won’t die, the meat is probably fine, the eggs left on the counter must be fine everyone here eats them. I have found myself often thinking about the maybes and having to apply reality to them. The food is probably a bit dirty, they probably didn’t wash their hands real good, it might have been old but it wont kill me. The reality is the people whose house I was at are likely on their way to hell.

Everything in me says don’t eat this, don’t drink the water offered to you, you don’t know where it came from but the faces in front of me need Jesus. Even if all the worst bacteria in the world are in the cup in front of me will I drink? Will I let my kid eat and drink? Absolutely. Jesus didn’t call me to worry about the maybes he called me to worry about souls. What ever the risks they are nothing compared to the potential gains. If I refuse and don’t relax how can I present the love of God to them. Who will disciple them? It takes life on life contact to make a difference and who am I to think I am too good to be one of those lives?

There are very few rewards that don’t have risk in life. How often are we willing to take risks for financial gain, to win a girl, to get ahead? Why are we so afraid to take risks to see people come to Jesus?

As I evaluate where Brazil is as a nation and think back on my history of missions trips I wonder what things could be like if we worried less about the maybes. I think we have tended to preach the gospel then retreat to safety. We have created in Brazil an environment where few would reject Christ, many would pray a prayer but few have been discipled. We have lived apart from the people we say we want to reach.

I wonder if we don’t do this even in the US? I am aware that it was rare I went around my neighborhood and visited with my neighbors. I didn’t go sit at the bar down the street and listen to peoples stories. I didn’t pray for those around me. I didn’t know who they were.

Today I seen one of the guys I met at the party at the little store by the house. We said hi and talked. I don’t know if I will ever see him come to Christ but I know if I hadn’t eaten a very scary piece of toast with some kind of tuna on it (I despise tuna, grossest thing on earth) I wouldn’t have recognized him today much less talked with him. I know a few days ago my landlord came to tell me his mom, she had bypass surgery for five arteries, was doing better and how much it meant to her when he told her I was praying for her.

I am learning that sacrifice and risk are the only things that will lead to touched lives. What areas can I continue to stretch, where do I need to sacrifice more? Where can you take risks, what can you give up? We need to be more concerned with the good mights. What we might see happen in the kingdom of God if we risk more.

Baby Shower

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

DOWNLOAD ALL

What is Contentment?

2011-12-06T08:38:00.001-08:00

Paul told us he was content in all things. I have always been encourage and believed I should be content in whatever circumstance. I have tried to do that. Tried to find a state of contentment when times are hard or times are easy. Tried to be content working a “normal job” when all I wanted to do was be a missionary. Tried to be content being a missionary when all I wanted to do was go back to the states and eat taco bell.

What is the point of all the trying? The point is that we are so often trying to find contentment outside our self. Trying to find an external state of contentment rather then coming to an internal conclusion. I am a bought paid for child of the living God. Contentment should be generated from the inside, from what Christ has done in me. From He who is dwelling in me.

Looking back I think the greatest thing that has happened in our time here is that I no longer feel the need to prove anything. I don’t feel the need to post results. I am not concerned with what I have to report. The amazing thing is this allows me to see more clearly the results that have happened. From changes in Brazilian friends, Christians I can see we have impacted. Too people we have heard are back involved with the Church in Foz.

There was a point I was really discouraged. The ministry we had been doing seemed to fall a part and end. The Saturday lunches and the kids ministry both came to a mostly unsatisfying end. They just kind of petered out. At the time there were no obvious results. I knew we had impacted people and obeyed God but there wasn’t any tangible person I could say changed. This is often the reality of ministry. You put a lot of time in and don’t know if anything worked.

It was really frustrating. I felt like people were supporting us and I didn’t know if we were worth it. I want to show results for the money people sacrifice for us to be here. The truth is my part is only to obey. Results are in the hands of God. True contentment comes when we accept we are God’s child, a prince (or princess) in a spiritual kingdom. Our part is to obey and represent. There is but one king, God. He is my loving father and I only need to live to please Him. He has asked me to live in Brazil, He sustains me, He leads me to tasks. What if anything comes from that is up to Him.

If I am looking for the results of ministry, family, church, comforts of where I live to satisfy me I will always be disappointed. If I live each day trying to please Him and trusting Him to do with me what He will I will not only be content but satisfied.

The funny thing is God is far more concerned with the results then me but He desires HIs results. I recently heard a report from Foz that several of the people we had been ministering to on Saturdays have started going to church again. One man Marcos was using crack and living on the streets. Heitor and I tried to help him get into a rehab center but he didn’t get in. I was blessed to be at a service in Foz a few weeks ago when he showed up to tell us he completed a program, had a home and was starting to work. Friends in foz tell me Marcos is doing very well. God produced fruit from what I thought fizzled.

Also Nelson, a fairly eccentric man that lives in his car and sells goods on the streets. He got connected through Saturdays. He has started coming to the church again. He is back together with his girlfriend. They have upgraded cars to a VW van and are asking Heitor to marry them. There has been fruit, it just took more time then I wanted.

I can’t say I have completely left behind the feelings on searching for validation in results. I can say I am much more content just being me. I am beginning to get it. I can say I can think about moving my family out to live on the river because I know we don’t have too. We are free. God is good. If we want to move back to Oregon or to Kansas we can. I wont be any more complete living on the river, in Africa, in Albany. Contentment, completing who I am comes only from relationship with my savior. I am here because as God’s child I will obey Him and am excited to see what He does with it. As long as He asks me to remain I will remain. Whether it is easy or hard, whether we receive support or struggle, whether thousands get saved or no one. We just need to remain, to obey, to be content being God’s child.

Yesterday a beautiful thing happened. Daniel got up and started reading his bible. He has completed the Samuels and is into Kings. It reminded me to get my reading done. What more can I ask to see then to see my kids desiring God. Even if war stories are a part of the motivation.

Thank you all so much. Remember if you want to help us remain click on the donate link on the right just below the picture of the kids.

God knows

2011-11-30T06:28:00.001-08:00

Looking back on the last few years is an interesting process. 4 years ago we were finishing off getting out of debt, closing the business, praying about going back to YWAM. God seemed to through us a curveball when he led us to our now beloved church WCC. Taking a job at a Baptist church didn’t seem to make sense. It seemed to be starting over. Though doctrinally I am pretty well aligned I didn’t have deep roots, I was wanting to go into missions starting over in a new church, building new relationships seemed to be going the wrong direction.

We were amazed at how quickly we fell in love with our church. Amazed at how God used us bringing more passion for foreign missions and how he has used WCC to launch us to Brazil. What we didn’t see was how he would continue to use our church not only to bless us, to visit with us on skype, to share with us financially, to pray for us but also to open doors for us here. God sees so much further down the road then we do. Here we are sitting in Corumba MS, Brazil, a million miles from anywhere. We had no connections and no idea what would await us but had got excited about the Pantanal (swamp land, buyou). The remote wetlands that are full of life, including people. An area of Brazil still in great need of missions. Because God grafted us into the Baptist movement we have been able to show up and see God use that to open doors with a very cool association of Baptist churches. God’s foreknowledge of Him bringing us here and our need for this connection amazes me.

We have chosen to attend the first Baptist church here. We are really enjoying the people. The pastor invited us to his home for dinner last night and we looked at hundreds of pictures of boat ministry out in the Pantanal. He is encouraging us and excited to help us minister there. Had we came on our own with no connection to our home church we would not have had the opportunities we already have had.

Last weekend Daniel and I went out to a little village with a group from the church. They were celebrating 9 years of consistent meetings. They were also beginning a commitment to going to the village every 15 days to train up leadership. We as a family are going to go out a little early the next time and wait a few days for the group. I am excited beyond what I can describe for Melissa and the girls to get to go. I met so many cool people the last time. The leader of the little congregation is a fishing Guide. I am having trouble not packing up to go right now. He has a set of pictures on his wall of his wife with a couple 50 pound catfish, assorted other family pics with piranha and what not, also of the whole family around a very large anaconda.

The people from the villages were really kind and simple, some came from other places by boat. It was very different. Saturday night as it began to get dark they all scurried home so nothing would eat them on the way. There are lots of kids and women but not too many men in the villages. I don’t know if they leave to go work or just aren’t around but I know it results in a lot of problems. A lot of the girls go to work in prostitution fairly early. There is a tourism season where a lot of people come to fish it creates a demand for girls. Many parents even turn to this with their daughters as a source of income. Pastor Altair and I were both very concerned for a girl named Jacqueline. It really appeared she was perhaps being groomed for a bad end. Alcoholism is a huge problem as well as a lack of health care in many villages. Boats pick up a lot of the kids for school, some kids in far remote villages even spend the week at school and only return home on weekends. Last night Altair and his wife were encouraging us to focus on the river. Telling us that is where missionaries are needed. Discipleship, food, medical, teaching the bible as many people don’t read. There is huge need, but we must wait on the Lord. There is need everywhere. It is hard to be patient and make sure what the Lord is leading. I want to sell the van, buy a boat and take off.

Porto Esperanca

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

DOWNLOAD ALL

If nothing else comes of it Daniel and I had a great time. He caught and held a piranha, touched a baby alligator, seen how many people live much different then us. God is doing a great work in us and I can only hope using us to do a great work in the lives of others.

Thank you again for partnering with us, loving us, praying for us. You are dear and important to our family.

an outsiders perspective

2011-11-18T10:16:00.001-08:00

I love Brazil, I love the people, weather, food and how simple life is here.In Corumba people sit in chairs outside their houses sometimes all day drinking terere and watching life go by. I’ve often wondered why so many do this. Is it because it’s to hot in their houses or they enjoy watching the kids play in the streets. The more I learn the culture here the more I can begin to understand and become like them. My theory is that they sit outside their house to say “Hey I’m here I’m available to talk to if you want, I’m friendly and want to connect with you”. As an American living here we tend to want to do the opposite. Run in our houses turn on the T.V. or computer be with our family not knowing that it probably comes across as “ I don’t want company, I’m not friendly and leave me alone. I remember when I was a kid growing up in the mid west people would sit in their lawn chairs on the front porch and everybody new each other. Somehow things have changed, we tend to stay in our houses and we never really get to know our neighbors. Maybe I’m wrong but as Christians shouldn’t we be “available” shouldn’t I be more friendly willing to sit out on the street and say “hey I’m here if you want to talk or share some terere”. I’m sensing that here in Corumba I will be alone a lot tending to the kids, cleaning, cooking and helping with the kids school. So far the ministry that we see is to dangerous for the kids, or on a boat that doesn’t fit all of us, or to late at night. Eventually there will be family ministry for us or a boat our whole family can be on but for now Ben must be the one who goes out to the drug addicts prostitutes or whoever else. As a mom and a missionary I’m asking God where my place is? I know it’s first of all a wife and a mother but I have a burning desire to help, to pray and to love people. So back too my first thoughts. The Lord brought this to my attention, am I willing to step completely out of my comfort zone. To sit on the street in front of my house and be available for my neighbors. To visit them to introduce myself and to bring food to them and to pray for them. I want to be willing Lord..

Last night I was able to meet one of the mothers of a couple of girls that come to our gate and beg for Juliah to come and play. I got the chance to sit with her in front of her house and chat for some time. I found out she has 15 kids yes that’s right 15 kids 1o grandkids and has been married for 32 years. We got to talk about the culture here and where she works. The states and Barak Obama, everybody loves talking about him. I then meet some of her daughters and a son and some of her grandkids. I was able in the end to tell her my testimony about what the Lord has done in our marriage. That with out Him and His grace we would not be married and we would definitely not be living in Brazil. She listened and I pray that even though I speak horrible Portuguese that I somehow was able to shed a little light on how big God’s grace is and his love for us.

I have been meeting more and more of the neighbors here the last couple of days and sharing some terere with them. What I really want is a natural friendship, nothing fake or awkward just simple friends and being able to share all the things God has done in my life. Can’t we all be used like? Reaching out to our neighbors being willing to stop what we are doing and just talk to them. Maybe you do, if so you are far ahead of me.

Our Bairro

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

DOWNLOAD ALL

Corumba, the adventure begins

2011-11-11T12:45:00.001-08:00

We are finally here and in a house. I can’t say what is going to happen but I can tell you it is going to be an adventure. We are without water more then we have it. It is hot and I desperately want to take a cold shower. Even if we had water it would be warm. Everyone has been sick, tired, had break downs and wanted to quit. I would imagine it is especially hard for my parents, who are helping us get settled. I know they think we are crazy. I know I am crazy.
For us to move here I remembered my friend Tim saying the romance had to die if they would one day go to china. The adventure of living on a frontier is little relief when you want to sit in McDonalds eating a big mac. I did my best to kill the romance and make the decision to come here with a clear head. Thinking of just how hard it would be. In fact I did such a good job I no longer wanted to come. When we got here I looked for every reason to quit and leave. I prayed over and over again that God would show me I was wrong and that he is leading us to Rio de Janeiro.
He didn’t. He opened a house for us to get into. Bigger then I ever expected though it isn’t perfect. He has provided even more contacts in ministry. He is giving me visions for how we can encourage the overall church movement in the city. I have been out on the streets until 2 am feeding and evangelizing drug addicts, transvestite prostitutes and the homeless. I have met with pastors and missionaries and plan to go tonight to feed more homeless. All in a week I spent trying to convince myself to quit and leave.
Right now we just have a contract on the house for 2 months. I don’t know if we will still have the ability to continue then but for now we are here. Sick vomiting people and all we are here. Pray that God gives us the ability to learn and grow into this city. To deal with the heat, the dust, the lack of water. To be witnesses to the many neighbors and to be bold. Pray we move without fear but have wisdom in a city where we stick out like you can’t imagine.
We are blessed by the Lord to be here. The kids are getting healthy and we are happy to be together. Thank you for your prayers and your love. Look forward to seeing you all, hopefully before too long.

New home

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

DOWNLOAD ALL

Through the Fog

2011-11-02T06:00:00.001-07:00

Sometimes in life as you listen to God you turn onto a road that seams easy and bright. Next thing you know you feel like you are in a dark forest with a heavy fog wondering if you heard God or perhaps if He is even there. Thankfully those dark, unsure tests of faith don’t last forever. Eventually you pass through to the other side where you can see clearly once again.

I think we are passing through one of those times. We chose to move to Corumba, began communicating and planning. Everything looked easy and bright. Then came the doubts and fears. We don’t have enough money, it is too far, too hot, too everything. Maybe we should go to Rio, be by the beach, connect with ministries there that have funding connections? Maybe we should rent a house here and work with YWAM? All sorts of doubts enter.

Praise God for these tests of faith. When I was in YWAM Los Angeles we used to say look to God’s face not His hand. I believe that is what God is saying to us now. We don’t know how this is going to work. We don’t have a house lined up. We don’t have the funds to move our stuff. We don’t have the ability to do this without a miracle from God. What better time to obey? There is no way we can take credit and no way we can take it for granted. Only by God, through God and with God can we move on. He is calling us He will finish the work He has completed.

The amazing thing is looking back over the last few weeks we see so many lessons learned in such a short time. So many confirmations. We have been resting and praying here at the YWAM base. We had the opportunity to receive my parents and help them get started on their 4 month trial run. We were blessed to be able to do outreach with the base in the favela down the hill. To invite kids to a program at the local Methodist church they are currently serving.

Jocum (ywam) Outreach

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

DOWNLOAD ALL

God has used this time to confirm in our hearts we are called. Without a doubt He has called us to missions. First as with all, to love Him. We however have the unique call to serve as long term, foreign missionaries. As a part of this, it is also confirmed that at least for now and probably forever that call is to the poor, broken and hurting of the world. Also that the best door to knock on is the kids. They open the door to the entire family. Also God is confirming my desire to plant churches and raise up pastors in their communities.

He also is confirming it is our time to move on. To go in faith to Corumba, or probably wherever we would choose, to step out and lead. To create and pioneer ministries and inroads with those who don’t know Jesus. We haven’t been lazy. We have learned language, culture, touched lives. Connected with churches, jocum, students at semear, ran a feeding program for the hurting, did youth groups, outreach in a favela, children’s ministry and much more. However it is time to focus on growing long term works.

Time to lead. Sometimes that will mean walking down easy roads but sometimes it will mean keep going in the dark forest. Don’t quit until we get to the other side. Be praying for us. We are following Jesus and hopefully leading others to Him.

We are moving. We will need to see significant provision for the moving expenses. We will need to see a house. We also are going to concentrate on raising our monthly support as that has dwindled the last three months.

We love and appreciate you all.

If you would like to be a monthly supporter click on this link:

http://shepsstaff.org/lyon.aspx

or mail a check to:

Shepherd's Staff Mission Facilitators

PO Box 53640

Albuquerque, NM 87153-3640

with the account number 4604 attached and in the memo

Wow

2011-10-16T07:14:00.001-07:00

We just returned to Foz do Iguacu from a scouting trip to Corumba. I still have many hours of prayer to process all that happened but want to share some early thoughts with you. There is very little doubt left in our minds this is where God is calling us. Maybe a touch when we remember the heat, the bugs, the heat, the remoteness, the heat, attacks from the enemy, oh and did I mention the heat. It was by far the hottest place we have ever been. It is early spring in Brazil and it was hot the second the sun was up. Sometimes late at night there was a comfortable breeze but for the most part we just sweated.

Alannah had the hardest time with the heat. She had heat rash, was constantly covered in sweat and got several mosquito bites but was pleasant most of the time. Too illustrate the heat there, most of the showers we seen don’t even have the ability for hot water.

On to the good. We really enjoyed the journey there and back. We seen a lot of open country and many animals. Including, Emus, deer, toucans, parrots, foxes, cranes, giant man eating cranes, enormous demon possessed road runners and much more.

When we arrived in Corumba we got a hotel. It was pretty dirty and certainly didn’t have any other families there but it was cheap and had air.

We began staying at this church the next day. While there we were able to attend an annual meeting of the Baptist churches for the state of Mato Grosso do Sul. We met many more people then you normally would in a six month period.

The kids were welcomed like we couldn’t believe. They were almost celebrities. I guess it isn’t every day a family of 6 Americans shows up at the end of the world. We were so blessed to see them make so many good friends.

For us and our ministry it was an incredible time. First of all the association of Baptist churches there is strong and committed to outreach. They are very welcoming of us and I got the chance to get to know two of them fairly well, at least for a 4 day period. They are currently reaching out to the ribeirinhos and have the desire to touch the less reached neighborhoods of Corumba. There was an American missionary presence there 10 years ago with the IMB (Southern Baptist). They left behind a good amount of structures and facilities for outreach. This looks like a relationship that could grow, they have an unused chapel in a neighborhood we may be able to do some kids stuff in.

One thing that came out of their presence there, the former missionary started an organization to continue ministering there. The Imb has changed focus to mega cities and tribes. They have purchased a small farm, have a missionary that arrived last April to oversee it and are currently praying for workers. Their vision for this property lines up very closely with what we desired to go there and do. It is early but this appears to be a work of the Lord. We went on faith and were encountered buy a Mississippian named Buster who couldn’t believe another American was there, much less a family wanting to live there.

There were plenty of challenges, we had some scares, I had a baby tarantula land on my shoulder, we face difficulty with the heat and much more. Nothing will be easy. There is much mocumba (Brazilian witchcraft) and Satanism there. The poor are very much wrapped up in that and spiritism. However the ability to do the things God has placed in our heart is ripe. Some buildings will need built, some money will be needed but God is able.

I could go on forever about all that happened there and could happen in the future. It is early though and what God will do is in His hands not ours. The point is this is where God is calling us and he has paved the way. Be praying, the warfare is thick but we are moving forward.

Don’t lose focus

2011-10-05T04:01:00.001-07:00

We are out of our house and free to begin planning our move. Free to scout out Corumba’ to be sure we are hearing rightly from the Lord. Free from the worry and stress over losing out deposit and the injustice of house rental in Brazil (at least for the moment). I should be relieved and excited, instead I find myself flat. Not excited, not frustrated, not joyful, not depressed just flat. As I sit here this morning, thankful to see Melissa excited about a trip to Corumba I begin to realize why my heart is empty.

I had been focusing on me, my family a bit, loosing supporters money, the injustice of being asked to paint a house inside and out for thousands of dollars, focused on lots of things. Unfortunately the Lord wasn’t my focus anymore. Instead of seeking Him each day I have been waking up, trying to get out of the house, find leverage to use in the deal with the landlord, think of how to make the next month work. Very little of my time, in all honesty, has went into abiding.

This isn’t the first stressful or frustrating relationship breakdown I have ever had. Yes he asked for such unreasonable things it left no room to meet in the middle. Yes I would have liked to have a friendly ending. So what. I have learned that these things can only bother you while you are going through them. They are only worth the stress equal to the amount of time you will remember it in the future. I will have forgotten this in 2 weeks, barring no further problems.

I have a loving savior that desires my time, a loving father that has gently led and called me to Brazil. I interact every week with an incredible culture, going into a favela, teaching a little bible study in the home of some teenage girls. Perhaps having an impact that will last long after I am gone. I am forgiven of the way I treated my family during the stress. Forgiven of the daily shortcomings I can’t overcome. Why is that sometimes not enough to keep me focused on the one who has done it all. Colossians tells us all things will be brought together in Christ, he is all in all. Nothing else should matter.

I don’t want to get caught up in my struggles as a missionary in a foreign land. I want to remember to seek God, love Him, serve Him, pray for my friends and family. I hope you all feel free to write us and ask for prayer. We often have time. I want to be as concerned with the needs of all our friends back Home as I am with mine and those around me. It is just hard sometimes. I often feel like I am on an island, there are people around me but I am different. Only my needs exist and perhaps I begin to ignore the lives of those around and those at home. This breaks the purpose of the love one another relationships we were created for and begins to eat away at me inside.

Pray I get on track with daily seeking the Lord. Pray I lead my family in times of prayer for others. We have done this much of the time here but with stressful situations you can get thrown off course. In the next couple transitional months pray we get back on track quickly with the most important thing. Seeking the Lord, daily time in the word with no agenda. Abiding, seeking, obeying, loving and caring for others.

… Come and Go…

2011-09-19T07:35:00.001-07:00

Things in life really do come and go. Emotions, seasons, family friends, all things. Some last a long time, hopefully family and friends, some are short but all things have an end.

Recently in my devotions I have read a few of the minor prophets, you know those books you say you believe are important but never read. The amazing thing is often Israel was in a state of disaster or impending disaster, the kind of season that overwhelms you as a person. You can’t stop thinking, can’t sleep, can’t function. Those seasons always ended. God was and is the only thing that is eternal. We are promised to share in that but we have a beginning. God always was and always will be. Those seasons of desperation must look so short to Him. He was telling Israel, look to me, this will end but they so often kept looking at circumstances, at their surroundings.

How often do we do the same thing. I know I had been. I was continuing to try and seek the Lord, be led. I have been working on finishing the last part of our residency papers, praying with Melissa and the kids about “our calling”. At the same time I was getting discouraged about some of the ministry things that ended. Some of the hardships. Instead of being thankful for the season of fruitfulness I was getting discouraged by a different season. We are in a season of change. A season of paper work, packing, cleaning searching for a new house. We couldn’t move on to something I believe will much better match who God has made our family to be if the season of busy ministry hadn’t slowed down.

I am putting together notes to teach on evangelism. I am looking at the story of God, the bible. How do we spread our faith, what is it, what is the purpose. It comes down to answering some of life’s basic questions. Is there a God, who is He, what does he want from me?. As I looked at the story of creation,the purpose of life (to be a reflection of God’s glory, we were made in the image of God) and the fall of man I was again struck at God’s mercy in bringing death. Life is a season. When sin entered the world so did the curse. Life is hard, it is often painful and difficult. If it didn’t have an end who could take it. Imagine living eternally seeing wars, poverty, starving children, divorce, selfishness etc.… you would go crazy. Seasons are things of mercy. We were created to reflect God’s glory but because of a broken world, by us, we don’t have the ability to doo it perfectly or eternally. We need seasons.

As we have accepted the season of change, this time of difficult emotions and uncertainty we have seen God’s glory. His purpose in our lives. Over the weekend a mom and one of the girls we had been ministering with came by the church to see if I could help them pick something up and invite us to a birthday party. When I delivered a big wooden wire wheel all the kids came to say hi. It was natural. Then at church yesterday a couple of kids came that come once in a while. Antonio was laughing just playing ping pong with me. Gabrielle a girl who lives by the church and also just shows up to play ping pong listened to me struggle to share the gospel in Portuguese, I pray something got through. These were all interactions with simpler people, all different but all simple.

Farm kids, a lonely girl, a family from the favela. All different but all a confirmation for us that God has called us to the simple places. Yes there are simple people here, yes we have been ministering to people here. Yes God is closing that and leading us to an even simpler area.

He is good. The seasons in our life have purpose. They will all end, good and bad. They will never be wasted.

Pain and Excitement

2011-09-12T13:33:00.001-07:00

We are sure going through interesting emotions. So much excitement for what God is doing and what we may be going to. At the same time so much pain for what we are leaving behind.

When doors shut in order to open the doors to go to the Pantanal I think my fingers were in them. We had been getting to know some good kids. They were learning and growing. They seemed to have an appetite to grow. They suddenly disappeared and it hurts a lot. I don’t know if there is something we could have done different. Did we go to fast, did we come on to strong. It is almost like dating. More experience and time will probably shed more light on todays situation. I am also convinced with a little effort we could get them back again. In the end though, I am fully convinced it is time for us to move.

Before then we plan to spend time in their neighborhood, play soccer, encourage them to get involved in one of the many churches within a few blocks and do our best to leave well. Up until now it has been a little to raw. When I think about going by I get sad, I don’t know what I am going to say, again it seems a lot like dating.

Maybe there are some ministry lessons to be learned in those similarities. I often am surprised at how similar things are to business and draw from those experiences. Today I will be negotiating with our landlord trying to end without a relationship breakdown but still protect my deposit. That is something that draws a lot from that period.

Maybe there is a time to treat people like you are chasing a girl. Christ called us his bride, he pursued us like a lost love. Maybe as ministers of the gospel that is the attitude we need. Maybe it is right and healthy that we hurt like a rejected suitor when things don’t work out.

God is good and in the end we have to leave people in His hands. It is Him they are responsible to not me. The kids and parents we had been working with ultimately need to desire God to the point they pursue Him. They need to find a church and plug in. I have to leave it in His hands.

We certainly can’t wait to get to Corumba, to scout out the next thing. There is so much to be excited about, but please pray that we leave well. That we have wisdom. That we love those we were serving.

Thank you all for praying. Love you much,

Ben and family

Understanding

2011-09-06T07:39:00.001-07:00

After a little more than a year in Brazil, and a few years of planning to be missionaries we may finally be beginning to understand what that means for a family of 6. We left for Brazil with a lot of different ideas in our minds and hearts but little idea of specifics. Little idea of how to bring those things together. At times it made it very challenging. We would be sharing with people, raising support and our best answer for what we would be doing was go to Brazil and give glory to God. Our hearts have always leaned towards the poor, hurting, lost people who need Jesus.

When we first came we thought perhaps we would connect with the street peoples of Sao Paulo, perhaps work in a favela there. As we looked at apartments there it became clear our family wasn’t ready to live in a city of 20 million plus. We moved on to Foz to do a missions training school we had been planning to do a little later. It was a great time of learning, getting comfortable being a family in a second culture, Alannah being born and much more. We finished the school and settled into the process of learning language and getting our residency. Foz has been the perfect place for that. We began exploring some ministry options and learning who we are as a family. We discovered a heart for tribal peoples as we had some of our first experiences with them. We began to dream of maybe one day going to Africa, perhaps one of the Portuguese speaking nations like Guinea Bissau. I believe that may still be a part of our future, a country that has a much smaller church presence.

We then began to see some ministry open up here and satisfied ourselves with that. We began to understand God gives us dreams of the future but leads, guides and prepares a large family gently and slowly. There is a point where calling, preparation and timing come together. Until then it is a lot of fun but often painful success, mistakes and sometimes embarrassing learning experiences.

One thing that has been clear from the beginning is that we have a goal and desire to move further. To go closer to the edge of the frontier. We even considered changing our minds shortly before we came and heading to Jordan to do a school with YWAM. Not out of flakiness but because as a missionary your desire is to give the gospel to people who don’t have it. Everything in our lives is preparation for something further down the road at the same time as an opportunity to see God do something in the moment. We had been thinking of doing a school of frontier missions here in Brazil or in Argentina with YWAM but have come to the understanding our family needs to settle for a season. It isn’t easy to move and change.

Because of that, we had been thinking we would just settle here in Foz, grow the ministry we were seeing with the kids. Reach out here, open a youth center, perhaps see it grow into a church in a poor community. It wasn’t going to completely fulfill our desires but it seemed to be what God was doing. We left for a vacation to get some papers we need for our residency. When we got back the kids had disappeared. It quickly became clear God was shutting a door.

Over the last year our desire has grown to live in a more rural area. We love being with simple people. For people that have been to Mexico with WCC the area of San Luis is a perfect example. A small city in a rural region with lots of little towns around. There was a point several years ago we seriously were considering moving there to work with Caring Hearts. It is the perfect example of what we would want to do.

As we processed the shut door coupled with the last paragraph we began to see God clearing up our vision. We feel it is time for us to pick an area to settle into. Clear up our vision for people. We appreciate the way people have supported us just getting settled in. Getting our feet under us but now it is time to go somewhere.

Our hearts are clearly to be in a more rural region and we are going to go. We are going to begin by terminating our contract on this house. The year is up so we will give the owner notice tomorrow. We then will turn our focus onto the final paperwork for residency. These two things allow us to move out of Foz.

We believe God is calling us to a region known as the Pantanal. We have been researching a city Corumba, in Mato Grosso do Sul. It is on the edge of the Pantanal and the Bolivian border. North of the city is an area where some tribal people still live. It is full of Anacondas, big ones, Caymans (kind of a little crocodile), big fish, probably spiders and lots of other scary stuff. Not to mention being one of the major cocaine trafficking ports of the world.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corumb%C3%A1

http://maps.google.com.br/maps?q=corumba%20ms&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&hl=pt-BR&tab=wl

Our hope is to find a place to rent in that area. We want to move there in December or January. My parents will be spending the winter in Brazil with Calvary chapel. It will be nice to spend Christmas somewhere with family. We then will focus on building relationships with local churches and scouting the region for a good property. We hope to visit the States and maybe Canada next June. We will be raising more support and hopefully funds to buy the property.

Our desire would be to build something like Caring Hearts in Mexico. Starting with building a shop for a vocational school as well as class rooms for tutoring, English classes and bible. Eventually we would like to see dorms for kids camps and for teams to come down. The location if it ends up Corumba is perfect for outreaches to poor simple people in both Brazil and Bolivia. Bolivia is the country in South America second in my heart. I have never been there but am very excited about the idea.

We have a Paraguayan friend, Ariel (not the little mermaid though he is little) ready to go with us. Nothing is 100% but we are praying together every week. He speaks Spanish, Portuguese and Guarani a native tongue. He has quickly become my best friend here. It is exciting, communication with a friend in both our second language.

We appreciate you all and want to give you an idea of our direction. For prayer but also so you know we have visions, dreams and goals. God is putting it in our hearts that now is the time to run after those dreams. Look at this passage from Isaiah 40

28 Have you not known? Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He does not faint or grow weary;
his understanding is unsearchable.
29 He gives power to the faint,
and to him who has no might he increases strength.
30 Even youths shall faint and be weary,
and young men shall fall exhausted;
31 but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings like eagles;
they shall run and not be weary;
they shall walk and not faint.

Where is Our Refuge?

2011-08-30T14:20:00.001-07:00

I was reminded of a story this week. You remember the story in mark chapter 2 about four friends who lower a paralytic man on a mat down from the roof too where Jesus was teaching. The room was so full that they had to go up to the roof, probably up a ladder then break through the roof just to see Jesus then they lowered him down.

What true and faithful friends.

This week at the Saturday Lunch I was busy running around cleaning and getting food and looking after four kids. A group of street people came asking for food. I recognized most of them. I said “hi it will be ready in a little bit , they are making it” not really paying close attention to them. After a while I noticed a man bent over in obvious pain with what looked like a broken leg. He was sitting with a gentleman I had meet months before. I started to talk with them. The man in pain was in his early forties and his friend was telling me he had not eaten in 6 days and the food was hurting his stomach so bad that he had tears in his eyes. His friend went on telling me that he was in to much pain with his leg that he couldn’t get up from where he lives on the street to find food. So he had to help him find food and bring him to the only place he knew of that offers free food. I really wanted to know the situation so I got my friend who is Brazilian. He talked with him and found out that his leg had been broken for one year, probably seriously infected. My friend phoned for a ambulance for the man. He was shaking and a lot of pain plus his leg looked pretty horrible. I got to pray for him and ask him about Jesus. He said he knew Jesus and had a relationship with him. He didn’t have a bible so we gave him one. The ambulance came and took him away. He was on our minds all day. My friend gave them his number and told them to call him and let them know what had happened and if he had gotten medical treatment. I found out that night that they changed his bandages and sent him home, back on the streets with nothing but his pain and of course his friend.

That next morning my heart was heavy with sadness and compassion for this man and many others who showed up. One who is a girl 7 months pregnant living on the street and an obvious user. All I could do is cry out to God to comfort me and those hurting. I believe the Lord spoke to me and reminded me of his suffering here on earth and his compassion. What He seen and those he healed and that he had times where He had to cry out to God and pray for strength. How much more he loves and cares than I do. It is so much more than physical pain and suffering that He cares about. It’s our souls, our eternity. I prayed for their hearts to soften to His. That they would allow His healing in their lives and for His word to transform their lives. I only pray God uses me to help in the process, for their lives or for someone else. God also put few versus on my heart, for me and for the hurting

Psalms 28:8 The Lord is the strength of His people; He is the saving refuge of His anointed. 9. Oh, save your people and bless your heritage! Be their shepherd and carry them forever.

Proverbs 23:26 My son, give me your heart, and let your eyes observe my ways.

Saturday Lunches

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

DOWNLOAD ALL

Order

2011-08-23T07:40:00.001-07:00

The way God works is rarely what we expect. We are concerned with one thing and he is busy moving and doing things outside our field of vision. We went on vacation while going to get some papers we needed from the US embassy. During that time we were hoping to have God reveal for us more of our next steps. We have been in Brazil over a year and God seems to be directing that it is time to move more and more into our own ministry. Meaning more of a daily planned out, thought out, targeted ministry. I thought what we needed was to hear God say “stay in Foz and go to Porto Meira” or “Move to Rio de Janeiro and work with Aleixandre on the new property of theirs” perhaps “move to the Pantanal and begin a work with the simple farm workers there”. As a fishermen I was rooting for the Pantanal.

The funny thing is as we traveled and observed churches, pastors and missionaries. Even though we were on vacation. What I heard was God telling me to look at the fluidity of those whose lives are in order. What I seen is there is a big difference with those whose lives have a sense of order. Not everyone has the same amount of money. Not everyone who is in order looks the same. Some work part time, some go to school part time, some just work with the church but they all have a schedule. They all have routine.

How do I now apply this to my life. Well, I have desired more routine, more control but have been waiting to get busy so I would need a schedule. I then got busy but it had no continuity. Everything was in a different direction and I got tired. We have some kids that had been coming to church but our church isn’t equipped for children’s ministry, not at the same time as adults. So we started a Sunday afternoon program for them but this is a difficult time to get help. I was cooking food for Wed after service and running kind of a soup kitchen on Saturdays. This left me busy but not putting together a team for Sunday afternoons. I felt really good for a couple months. I was finally busy and feeling like a real missionary. Unfortunately I was watching what was going on and unhappy with the results.

“Vacation” helped me see nothing has been flowing together. I am currently reacting versus acting. In order to correct this I am going to stop a few things but more importantly schedule more. In order to get where we believe God is calling us we need to constantly prepare. I need to concentrate first on time with Him and the study of His word. If I want to disciple these kids, reach there parents, be fruitful in ministry I need to put far more hours into myself then I give. I already do good with my devotional life but I want it more scheduled so that I miss fewer days. Things come up, but if you are late on starting your devotions things come up more often. I am going to spend at least 3 hours a day 3 days a week preparing studies on certain topics and perhaps certain books of the bible. I am going to set aside an evening to meet with people who want to help with the youth outreach. I am going to set aside time to pray with the family. This fell away as we got busy but must return. I am going to be realistic. I am not a live by a calendar person. So I must have flexibility and real goals for change.

I believe the end result of scheduling and disciplining my time will be fruitful ministry wherever I go. Ministry that flows together and is productive not just busyness. I believe this will also help us to hear more clearly where God may lead us. He can’t lead us further until we learn to be disciplined here, it is His mercy.

Refreshed

2011-08-18T04:53:00.001-07:00

We are finishing up the last day or two of our vacation/getting our documents. I am sitting in a beautiful church in Curitiba. I would move here if it wasn’t so stinking cold. It is amazing to me that over the course of these two weeks it is only in the last day that I have began to feel refreshed. Really it was last night that it all started to come together.

We got to Curitiba in time to visit the Wednesday night service of Calvary Chapel. Tom Stowe is currently pastoring here and we only met him last week. He is using Wednesday night as a worship, prayer, sharing, let the Spirit of God move kind of time. It was really beautiful. We started the evening by just waiting on the Lord, sitting a few minutes in silence and letting the busyness of life drift away. Letting God speak into our hearts before we entered into worship. During that time the song Shout to the Lord began going through my mind. I realized that in the last 3 weeks we have been with 3 different pastors, been in 3 cities, been in slums and rich neighborhoods. The one thing all men can do to be refreshed and healed is to shout to the Lord.

Sometimes we get so busy trying to figure out what we are doing. Whether it is work, college, retirement, missions, pastoring or even just being a kid. We get busy, we get rushed, we get tired and we get more broken.

I walked into a pharmacy inside the City of God a fairly notorious slum. 10 feet away I knew the guy behind the counter loves Jesus. It shown all over his being. He was reflecting the glory of God in his daily job. Excited to meet me and far more excited to know I was there as a missionary. His face shown with joy. He lives in a very hard, very poor place but he is living for the purpose which he was created.

I get frustrated, bitter, impatient and begin to compare myself to others when I loose sight of that purpose. The more I look around at all the other broken people the more I loose sight of who I am and what God is doing in me. The more I feel like a failure, the more I need to serve God to feel good, the more I need to think of myself. The more I think of myself the more broken I become.

Last night as I just remembered to shout to the Lord and enter into worship, for me that is often just listening and reflecting as singing is not one of my gifts, I was refreshed. We have had a relaxing wonderful time. The kids got to surf, I got to a little. We were blessed to lay on some of the most beautiful beaches in the world. To visit a city many people only dream of going to. However that only prepared me for the refreshment I really needed.

As we worshiped and sought the Lord I seen all I need to do is praise Him. Looking up, looking directly at who has made me, looking for His pleasure not mine is what cures me of the sin that engulfs our world. If we don’t look up, glorify the lord, live our lives as an offering we will just continue to be tired. To be broken and dis-satisfied. If we praise Him, we will leave the things of this world behind and begin to see things in a very different way.

As we finish this time I see we have freedom. In the next 6 months to 1 year I believe we will finish our time in Foz. I don’t know that for certain but it is the sense I have. It isn’t a great place for our family to live. It lacks a lot of the things we would normally do to relax. We are satisfied in the ministry we are doing there but we have the freedom as we continue to learn and grow as missionaries and in the language to begin looking and praying for an area that suits us better. The point isn’t where we live or serve but do we glorify Him with the gifts and talents he has given us.

Refreshed

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

DOWNLOAD ALL

Much on our minds

2011-08-02T06:22:00.001-07:00

We have had such a good first year. Officially July 2 was our 1 year anniversary in Brazil, but we got to Foz around the 20th. There is still so much to learn about Brazil, about being missionaries, about us as a family but this seems to be a time to start focusing on how to bring the different ideas and visions together into a plan.

What I mean, after a year of being here inhibited by language and newness you realize a lot of ideas have crossed your mind. It feels very much like the first year I had in business, everything you do you think is going to be the thing that takes off. Often it is actually just a one time thing but then later becomes a small piece of the overall picture. The lack of ability to communicate and a family of 6 prevent most of them from taking off. Eventually as many of you have read we began helping the church do a lunch for people who need help. This then led to us starting a service for kids because of the response we have been getting.

We had a group from Canada here for 2 weeks. They really focused much of their energy on youth ministry and outreach with that group of kids. They gave us a great boost and now we have a large group that seem to desire to grow.

Now what? We are able to get going. We have some momentum. Now what? God seems to be giving us clear eyes to see mistakes we have made. To see things we can do better. To see a picture of how those ideas fit together. A vision of the ministry that is before us.

We need to learn how to incorporate this group of kids into the church. Right now it isn’t working real well. We are trying to get a service going for them on another day and get the parents to quit sending younger ones to services. We don’t have the space to educate adults and kids. We end up trying to contain the kids instead of educating.

We are going to begin praying about starting a youth center in one of the more at risk neighborhoods. Somewhere that would be set up as a youth outreach but could have bible studies. We are going to pray for people to come along side us in this and pray for contacts with churches in the area that want to learn and grow in youth outreach.

We are going to look for an opportunity to visit the west of Brazil. The Pantanal is perhaps the poorest and least evangelized part of Brazil. Melissa and I have a continuous growing desire to minister in a simpler place.

Next week we are going to leave on vacation in faith. We don’t exactly have the money but we need some papers from the US embassy. It will cost us an extra $650 or so to have the family go to Rio instead of just me. I believe this is a necessary time of rest and prayer. Tim is leaving and the church is transitioning to Brazilian leadership. I may or may not be a part of helping them. Regardless this is our time to begin stepping out and building our ministry. We need to pray first. Pray for God’s provision and an opportunity to connect with the YWAM bases that are already doing much of what is on our heart.

Thanks and love you all.

Adrenaline

2011-07-25T05:24:00.001-07:00

We have had a great week. A group from Edmonton has been here for a week. They are helping with many things at church. Much of their first week they did things with the kids and youth we have been working with.

Last Sunday they were around and did a song with the kids at our normal program. Then we went out the next day and invited kids back to the church for a vbs they had planned. We had rough weather and the kids were a tad stand offish at first. I made more trips back and forth in our van then ever before and we managed to get a decent number. Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday they did a vbs in the afternoon and then a coffee shop in the evening.

It seemed like the vbs was kind of spiritual warfare. In all honesty the kids come to play ping pong and suffer through the lessons. They were doing a longer program then the kids were used too and they complained relentlessly that they wanted to play ping pong. It was driving me nuts.

Going through the favelas inviting kids we were able to pray for some people. One man has a swollen infected foot that I don’t like to think about. Another is a 96 year old Grandma that wants to try and go to church. Last night her feet hurt and her daughter didn’t think she could walk the path up to the road. This highlights the thought that we may need to do something in their neighborhood soon.

Friday and Saturday they did youth conferences. It is hard here in Brazil to distinguish youth, that seems to include anyone who comes. We had told the youth if they went to both nights they could go free to Recanto do Gaucho, a farm where they have playgrounds, horses, food, music, pools in the summer and even an Alligator.

Saturday they made a very clear presentation of the gospel. They had the room divide themselves into those who knew they would go to heaven and those who weren’t sure. Then invited all who wanted to be sure to pray with them. Everyone prayed. There is still much work to be done but what a boost.

Sunday the kids all looked very excited and played all day at the farm. They ate a ton. We sent 30 kids or so by city bus several miles out of town. Then I and a couple others shuttled them down the lane. They start cooking the ribs at 8 in the morning and serve them at 2. I loved taking three of the little girls to look at the Alligator. They turned and ran at the drop of a hat. Even after the 5 hours there and 2 bus rides most of the kids stayed for church. We were tired, they were tired, church was hard but praise God they are beginning to listen.

Today Melissa is with the group helping them at a school for the mentally and physically handicapped. Something she has wanted to do for months. Pray she has a great time and sees doors open for future volunteering. God is so faithful.

Pray for us, we have seen provision of money for a washing machine and to cover the Federal police fees we had a couple weeks ago.

We are still a bit short for our bills and food the last week of this month.
We also need to make a trip to Rio or Sao Paulo right away to get some papers.
We need to focus on finishing our residency in August and September.
We need wisdom how to follow up with these kids and their families.

Tim and TaLisa will be leaving very soon. The guys in the church will have their hands full learning to run the church and minister to the current crowed. They are more then capable and will do well. This will put more responsibility on us to invest in the families we have been working with. We don’t know if that will mean bridging the gaps for them into this body or trying to create a body within their neighborhood and meeting their needs. God knows, we just need to pray.

Recanto do Gaucho

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

DOWNLOAD ALL

A year in another land

2011-07-12T07:09:00.001-07:00

After our first year in Brazil ended ten days ago we reflected quite a bit on how much change we had gone through. How hard or actually how impossible it would be to go back now. We aren’t the same people. I’m not saying it makes us better people or that everyone should try it. Just that in our case it created a time of isolation, a time of concentrated growth. It has been like a green house, creating conditions inside our family that didn’t necessarily exist around us.

At times we had too much time on our hands at times we tried to be busy and create opportunity. It took us time to get patient and relax, to settle in and let God begin opening doors. I think maybe we are getting there. Settling in to our own, looking for opportunities but not pushing. Willing to take them but not desperate for something to do.

Now, we are continuing to work with kids from a hard neighborhood. We went by there the other night for a street party they were having. It is an annual festival, kind of a winter or harvest thing. Overall it was pretty cool but seeing the 13-15 year olds openly drinking in front of their parents was a bit hard. Also seeing some of them starting to reject us a bit as they realize we are missionaries, there to see them submit to Christ. This begins to demonstrate for us what Jesus went through leaving heaven to come to earth and be rejected. It is all worth it to hear Vitor yell Ben and get hit at 50 mph with a giant hug. Many of the girls are real sweet too. We are growing in our heart for the girls as we go there and see the girls Moriahs age ceasing to play and starting to look for more sexual attention.

What does this next year bring, we aren’t sure. I think it brings more growth, a beginning of understanding how a family of 6 ministers, more clarity in where God is calling us and many more things we can’t foresee. The bottom line is a family of 6 moves slow and seemingly inefficient. However with the kids in school, Melissa having different relationships, me going out to get things we need for the house and so on I am beginning to see how God can multiply our ministry through our numbers. We all have a place and we are our own ministry team. That is if we let God develop it naturally around what he wants to do with us.

Thank you all for your prayer and support. Here are some upcoming needs you can pray for and consider helping with.

To finish our residency we need to see $1500-2000 dollars come in
Our wash machine broke and we really need one, 6 people clothes by hand isn’t going to work $600
We need some more storage furniture for the house. I am building a bed right now with drawers under it but we are under furnished. Items range $400-$800
We may best minister by starting a part time business, giving jobs to people and making a little money to help with ministry expenses. We need wisdom for this. What kind, what days, selling American food, building furniture. There may be some license and other start up costs if we do this. $500-1000

Embracing Our Inadequacy

2011-06-27T10:21:00.001-07:00

Friday as I (Ben) talked with a new boy at Ciad he showed me a picture of his girlfriend. She was 7 or 8 months pregnant in the photo and he told me she gave birth one month ago. He had told me he had about 3 or 4 months inside already and hoped to get out within one or two years. As I looked at the photo I was beginning to loose it, I couldn’t handle the thought of the repeating cycle that brought Kleber there and will likely bring his children there. I asked him if she lived close, he quickly responded she lives with me, correcting himself with she did. He went on to say she went to stay with her mom for the help but when he gets out she will come live with me again. He is almost 17. My heart was breaking looking at a boy that hoped to have a family with a girl he left to have their baby while he is in prison. In my mind I knew the reality is she is likely already with someone else. It’s the lifestyle. What do I say?

Saturday we had a lot of people come to lunch once again. Many of the same kids, coming to eat, play some ping pong and go back home. Homeless people that come. Guys in their 20s leaving society behind to smoke crack. They don’t even realize they are homeless yet. Their minds are still lucid enough to have a conversation with you but you can see it fading right before your eyes. Some of the street women we interact with are pregnant and I have been unfortunate enough to pass and catch them smoking crack.

Sunday as Melissa and I were at the church preparing for the kids to come we sat down to pray. Both feeling overwhelmed and underprepared. We sat asking God to do something, to help us focus, to give us direction, wondering if any kids would come in the cold weather. We ended up with about 20 kids coming on their own without us going and getting anyone. Lori had to rearrange her teaching a bit and put the flannel graph away as mostly teenagers came. Melissa taught the older ones to make pancakes. I played ping pong with the boys. Lori summed up our Memory vs. Matt. 6:33 with an almost word for word edition of what I was about to say. Melissa had just given her testimony and it seemed to crack through a few hard shells.

Today, I realize all the little things we are doing don’t matter. We are completely inadequate and need to embrace that. It isn’t bad. We need to remember that 0 times infinity is 0 but 0 times God is infinity. Our efforts in their best form will fail to change the hearts of even one lost soul. However when you multiply our worthless effort times and infinite creator you have limitless possibilities.

After a weekend of reflection and revelation what has changed? Very little outside of perspective but that can be a big change. This church is a few weeks away from being turned over to Brazilian leadership. Tim is leaving. We have been here a year learning language and culture and helping with a few things. As this unfolds I realize I need to begin to watch more closely what God is doing in our own lives. We are seeing doors open and observing needs in a certain neighborhood. Perhaps we need to begin to focus our energies and efforts there. The time may be here to spend our time and energy zeroing in on the thing God has put in front of us and start saying no to things that distract us from that. I have been a learner of language, culture, style, ministry of Tim but perhaps now it is time to focus on learning more of who we are in ministry. That is a big change. It doesn’t mean we are leaving the church to start our own now. It doesn’t necessarily mean any change in schedule now but it certainly means to focus our observations more inward and on what God is doing with us.

At the end of this first year, just one week away, pray for us. We are so thankful and have been so blessed. We have been provided for month to month. We are learning the language. The kids are well. The first half of our residency is taken care of. We have a wonderful asset in our Kombi, VW bus. We still need to see the last part of our residency settled. We need around $1,500 us to finish that. We need to see in increase in our monthly support as costs have increased here and the dollar fell. Also we may need more for ministry and not just living. God knows all this and we aren’t worried. We also would like to visit Oregon and maybe Kansas later this year. It is all in the Lord’s hands.

Bless you all

Tired, confused, excited, hesitant……

2011-06-20T10:30:00.001-07:00

There is no end of words we could use to describe our state of mind. God is beginning to do things we aren’t ready for. 2 months ago we were thinking of moving to another city because nothing was happening, now I am completely overwhelmed. What do we do with what is happening?

It isn’t like we had some word from the Lord “Go to this neighborhood and start something with these kids”. Frankly we were bored and looking for something to “mess around with” while waiting for what God might be leading us too. We thought we would be going to another city and perhaps taking over a kids ministry there. We don’t want to start something. We don’t “KNOW” Portuguese, we don’t know where to begin with so many problems in front of us.

However, yesterday we went to their neighborhood where Melissa and Jerus played soccer with them. As I walked the streets, where there was at least a couple hundred people all I could hear was Ben look at me, sit here, Ben what city are you from, Ben come here, hey kombi man. It was like I have 50 kids. Melissa being one of them, she was in her skirt and nice shirt from doing kids ministry and covered in red dirt head to toe. Lori and I were watching the game and I mentioned how dirty Vitor was, a very cute, very toublemaking half of a set of boy girl twins. Vitor and Vitoria, they really are special. Lori responded “have you seen Melissa”.

Where it is taking us we don’t know but this I do. When I woke up this morning the little part of me that always feels bad about raising support, asking for money and the idea that the money is for us, was gone. I realized we aren’t raising support so we can live in Brazil, we are raising money for them. Right now, they are on track to rinse and repeat. They are going to repeat the life of their parents, of their community, of poverty, of drugs, sex, hopelessness and violence. When we are looking for support it isn’t because we don’t want to work. Believe me, I want to go back, start my business again and by a couch that doesn’t kill my back. Give my kids birthday presents and parties, see my daughter start middle school with Jessica and Molly.

The next 6 months to a year we are going to try things, fail, succeed and undoubtedly feel unprepared and useless. Hopefully we learn a few things. We are going to need to raise some money from both the US and Brazil to perhaps rent a building, buy games, feed people, who knows. We are going to need to build a team of helpers. We absolutely need to wait on the Lord and make sure what He is doing. In the end I hope we have touched some lives with the love of Jesus. I hope we can share the truth of His word with kids, teens, parents, friends and the hope that comes from a lifetime of obedience.

I feel like I have learned so much the last couple months and I can’t wait to see what God teaches us next. Tim had suggested getting a ping pong table a while ago, someone said I have legs, Tim bought a $50 piece of MDF and I mad a table. He got a net and paddles and it transformed our church. We had problems with new people getting to know old people. Between a ping-pong table and me cooking some American foods on Wednesdays we have seen fellowship happen in a whole new way. Last night 30 or so people were hanging out at the church playing and watching ping pong. We left early and got home at mid-night. The pizza hadn’t even came yet.

God is teaching us to trust him. Build relationship, try things, trust simple ideas and learn to be free to say we need things. I didn’t want to ask for a car but I want to once again say thank you and it is a large factor in so many positive things happening. Before a car I couldn’t even get my tools to the church to make a ping pong table. We couldn’t get groceries and have energy left to go into a neighborhood to meet people.

You are all loved. We miss you all, especially yesterday. I long to be home and with you. However, we now are beginning to see what God has created us for. I challenge you, take risks, sacrifice your time and see how you can be blessed in the service of our savior.

Grace vs. Works?

2011-06-13T10:16:00.001-07:00

It is clear God is leading us to work with kids and families by our house. It is equally clear we need help. As we begin the process of looking for that help I am challenged to think through and deal with a few issues. Works, Christian service, who, how often, gifts, calling, lots of things come into the effort of building a team to reach this neighborhood.

This morning as I read 1 Timothy I was thinking about grace. I had a conversation with a friend on facebook last night. She has consistently helped with the lunches on Saturday, going out and inviting people and is interested in helping with the kids on Sunday. She was telling me last night she comes from a point where she burned out, she is just now wanting to serve the Lord again. This is common here. Many churches put a heavy burden on people. They don’t know grace, all they know is go to church every day, help with everything, you have to serve, do what your pastor says, etc...

The worst part is I think it is based on truth but missing substance. Christianity is grace but it isn’t meant to be a party. Sometimes we see the pendulum swing. No more service but pizza every night, games, sports, bbq’s with friends. This is based on truth as well.

As I was sharing with her last night balance comes when we sacrifice our life for Him who gave all for us while doing things we like. I was explaining to her, I don’t want to put together a Children’s program with certain elements and then force people to cover those things. Rather I want to give a platform where you can come and do what you like to do but with kids who need love. This of course doesn’t mean we wont at times have to do things we don’t like. In my reading Paul is giving instructions to slaves to obey their masters, I don’t think being a slave is usually something you want.

I think Francis Chan has it right in Crazy Love. Approach it like you are approaching a future wife or husband. If you are a singer you will write music, if you are an artist you will paint pictures, I have made things for Melissa and watched my dad make and plant gardens for my mom. Use the talents you have out of love. The flip side of this would be you can’t say you love Jesus if you aren’t using your talents for Him. That isn’t about works to earn salvation or favor with God it is the simple reality that you can’t say you love what you don’t invest in.

We have to go through these questions ourselves. Why are we here, what should our schedule be like, how many times a week will we be with the kids? So many. I shared yesterday with the kids that the point of the miracle of loaves and fish is to put your faith in God not what you can see. Life is hard. We are being challenged with that. We have a little shortfall this month, I need to make a trip to Sao Paulo, get papers, finish residency, we would like to visit the states. I don’t see the money for any of these things. We just asked and received a car I don’t want to ask for more. Am I here because it is all going to be easy? No, I am here because Jesus first loved me and He loves the kids we are working with. How can I not sacrifice my life to come.

I have heard people say for many years I am not an evangelist, I don’t do kids ministry, I am called to make money and give, I am called to Africa and will serve God when I get there. The truth is if you aren’t using your gifts or doing anything you don’t know what your gifts or calling are. The truth is the kids we are working with are already in a type of hell and if we don’t do something they will be there eternally along with their kids and grandkids…….

Grace isn’t not having to do things. Grace is doing them because you love Jesus. Works isn’t serving Christ it is lovingly sacrificing your life for Him.

If grace leads you to spend your time, money, energy and so forth making your life here more comfortable it isn’t grace. If works makes you feel important and useful they don’t please God.

Working in grace is realizing Jesus gave all and working to see people come to Him as if their life depends on you. It is also going to sleep at night knowing if they go to hell it is their responsibility not yours. Your job and mine is to give every bit of time, money and energy we can to representing God’s kingdom here on earth. Not because we have to but because we can’t help it. Grace is also realizing it’s a marathon and taking a break when you need it so you can keep going.

I want to be able to tell you I am here because I love Jesus. In that sense a shortfall this month is purifying. I can’t be here for the money or to go out to eat because it’s not there. I can’t be here because it’s easy because I don’t know how it will work to keep these “ministries” going this month. I am looking beyond that knowing it is Jesus who is going to keep it going.

I want to see the people around me understand this. It isn’t because we are missionaries and have nothing else to do, but it is because Jesus loves these kids and he is trusting them to us. All we have to do is love them. Doing things we like with them whether it is playing futebol, dancing, crafts, building things from wood or just sitting with them gives us opportunity to touch the heart of God.

I would challenge you, are you impacting your neighbors, your co-workers, people in your city. Are you exhibiting love for Christ or love for self? Do you have to be a missionary or pastor to be used? If you aren’t an evangelist but an encourager couldn’t and shouldn’t that be used to point to Jesus?

If God is giving me these kids to love I will love them until He says go somewhere else. If I have to look for a job tomorrow and love them on the side I will still love them. I am not trying to work for my salvation, as I told a Jehovah's witness the other day that is a waste of time, I am trying to fall in love with Jesus. Try it with me, sacrificing your life for Him is rewarding, rejuvenating, worth it in every way and you will never regret it.

Edge of the desert

2011-06-06T10:24:00.001-07:00

It seems like we may have finally arrived at the edge of the desert. Arriving in a new country, culture, language and even having a new baby is hard. At the same time you want to be missionaries, lead people to Jesus, work with kids, work with the hurting, whatever your passion is. You have studied, prepared raised money but you discover you are totally useless. There is nothing you can do on your own. You can’t communicate with the people you came to reach.

Over time it became difficult to be content. The first few months we kept busy with paperwork, having Alannah, school but through the summer we began to feel isolated and frustrated. We couldn’t quite do anything on our own.

Just about the time we thought we couldn’t take it anymore we began to see some breakthrough. I have shared about the growth with lunch on Saturdays and the kids coming to church. As we have begun to respond to this we are learning something really amazing.

We can do this. We don’t speak good Portuguese, we don’t have enough money, our church doesn’t have the perfect space but none of those things matter. God uses people who are willing and in His timing.

Yesterday we did a kids service at church in the afternoon. We weren’t fully prepared, we hadn’t met to plan anything but we were going to try. We picked up Ariel, a friend who is a student at Semear, a missions training school. We got to church and a handful of kids showed up. We began playing ping pong with them and I left to see if anyone wanted a ride. Joao had said more were coming but I decided to help it along. On the way back from picking up a handful of girls we seen another group almost there. We picked them up and got back to the church to find out plenty more kids had shown up.

Lori and Neto arrived just in time to help us bring them in for a memory verse and a story. It went very well to use the church n the afternoon versus the night when everyone is there. We were able to use the sanctuary, projector and sound system. We had the parking lot empty for games and no need to worry about noise. We gave them cake, played with them and gave them a little story but most of all love.

It really was amazing driving about 20 of them home, all at the same time in my 9 passenger van, listening to them laugh and yell for friends. These kids didn’t want to leave just because some people gave them a place to play and loved them. They spend their days in the streets in front of their little houses. Little kids playing in the street, 4 and 5 years old.

We don’t need perfection and money to help them we just need to give a little time.

Relevance?

2011-05-30T07:38:00.001-07:00

I am pretty sure I have blogged about this before but it is on my mind once again this morning. Last night, I picked up 14 kids, ages 5-16 and brought them to church. They are from a poor neighborhood that could be considered part of a small favela. They and some of their moms have recently started coming on Saturdays for lunch. Actually they have just started coming 2 weeks ago so this is very rapid sudden progression. It is forcing us to look at what it takes to meet their spiritual needs on top of their physical and emotional needs.

These kids and mothers are brothers, sisters, cousins, mothers of boys Heitor, Tim and I have met in the prison. Saturday the Mother, Aunt, and cousin of one boy in particular were at lunch. Last night his sister and cousin came to church.

This is the area Melissa and I are gifted but frankly it is a whole new culture from the church we are currently involved with. Yes it is Brazil, yes it is the same city but it doesn’t seem like the same country. 2 Sundays ago when I went to pick people up for church a very cute little boy named Luis would run out and hit the back of a passing car, he is 5. No parents around watching him, no sisters, brothers, just him playing in the street. He wanted to go with me but I couldn’t bring myself to take a 5 year old alone without knowing the parents. I doubt they would have cared. Thankfully he came with a big group Saturday. It was so cool, we went to their street to remind them and everyone there said they were already on the way.

When they come to church, I brought some last Sunday, Wednesday and again last night, they don’t understand the concept of the lesson. They ask lots of questions, they interrupt, they are curious and hungry. It is great!

It is bringing up some questions

These kids are at high risk, what are we going to do to offer them the life skills necessary to break the cycle
Does our current format and location lend itself to ministering to the kids at the same time as our service
Is God asking us to spend a couple years in Foz growing a ministry here
Do we add a kids service Sunday afternoon
How do we build a trust relationship with the parents
Do they need their own church in one of their houses

God is doing something. Heitor has been inspired by the connection with Simon’s family to go out with me to Cidade Nova tomorrow and look up more of the kids from the Prison.

We want to be relevant, we want to reach those God has called us to reach. What does that mean, we don’t know. We do know he is confirming his call on our life to the poor and broken. He is also confirming this is a separate and distinct ministry from ministering to the middle class. Can the two work together or do they need to be like our home church? One church but with 2 congregations, we make the distinction on language. Can you make the distinction on Income, education so on? It is another culture. Does our inhibitions about making those distinctions limit us from being affective?

Pray for them

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

DOWNLOAD ALL

Kevin – A real leader

Ivone – A great helper

Rafael – Sweet kid

Pamela – Intelligent, confident girl

Paula – Kind, quiet girl

Joao (John) – Big goofy kid

Everson – Reserved

Rafaela – Quiet teenager

Rafaela – The other one, outspoken and fun

Rafaela – The little girl

Vitor and Vitoria – Cute trouble making twins. Especially vitor, cute little pain

Bruno – A friend of Daniels from school

Luis – I would take him home in a heartbeat, he didn’t come last night but he is my little car slapper

I don’t remember the names of the other three who came last night but pray for them.

We love and miss you all

God is moving, time to guard our hearts

2011-05-23T09:48:00.001-07:00

Wow, we had a real breakthrough this weekend. Saturday we have been doing lunch at church for people from the street, or whoever needs help. We had focused a lot of our efforts inviting people in the heart of the slum or off the street corners. This last Saturday I took Jerus and Ariel two blocks past the heart of the favela to a semi new area. It is hard to explain, unless you live in Albany, but the neighborhoods here change block to block dramatically. There were an astonishing amount of kids out playing. We got out and handed out flyers door to door. We always approach by asking if they know someone who needs help, that way they don’t feel looked down on.

We went on to our normal neighborhood and then the streets around Centro. When we got back to church a couple of our normal were already there. As I got them sat down and food I seen the first group of kids approaching. I went out and welcomed them in. A minute later another group came around the corner.

As that group of 8 or 9 finished eating I taught them to through an American football and began playing with them. Next thing we know a Chevy, cavalier basically, drove up with 10 or more people in it. Then more came. Really, it was amazing the turn out. I continued to play with the kids including our kids and the Roger’s kids. Several moms had came and sat talking with a few ladies from church. There was such a large group we set up a microphone so I could share a little with all of them at once. Normally we stick to one on one.

After that taste of the Gospel and our style of church I gave a group a ride home. Many of them expressed interest in coming to a service at church Sunday and I agreed to pass by and pick up whoever wants to go.

When I returned another girl had came. She really looked dirty, depressed and hurting. Melissa told me her and some of the other girls were talking to her and found out she had just left her house because her boyfriend was drunk and getting abusive. She had the cutest 3 month old boy, I wanted to take him and tell her to go on. She was only 17, they were both so dirty. She expressed some interest in changing but also looked reluctant to take serious action. We prayed with her, shared with her, tried our best to love her and give her contact information for a pastor in Paraguay. It was very interesting for me to share in Portuguese and have it translated to Spanish. Hopefully the Holy Spirit was somewhere in that process.

The day was really exciting. We have done the wordless book with kids the last two weeks and I plan to try and add a kids program at the end this Saturday. Pray God leads the growth of this ministry.

Sunday when I went to pick up those who wanted to go to church many of them got shy and ran to hide behind their houses. It was funny. I didn’t go away though and after a while one mom and five kids decided to go. Christiana, Rafael, Pamaula, Paula, Erika, and I am sure one more. I believe they are scouts, they said they enjoyed it and I pray Wednesday and next Sunday more come.

I believe God is guiding us to a neighborhood where Melissa and I can have an impact. I believe he wants us to go there more, do some of the things on our hearts, impact some children, mothers, dads. I also believe we need to be careful not to start thinking to highly of ourselves, of our ministry, of our impact. This is a time to guard our hearts and thank God for the door he is opening.

Love you all, thank you all, miss you all

Pray for our continued growth in language, as a family, spiritually. Pray for our health as we are noticing some areas we need to be careful. Pray for continued financial provision as we have had to increase the amount we draw from shepherd’s staff. God is good, big and faithful. We want to do good work and trust Him.

Blessings,

Great weekend

2011-05-17T15:36:00.001-07:00

We really had a great weekend. Once again having a car is such a huge blessing, we have done more since we got it then the previous two months combined.

Friday I bought a basketball and took it to the boys prison with me. To the semi free part. I had played soccer with some of the guys from church and their friends the previous Monday. It had highlighted I am getting older and need to exercise anyhow so I thought I could add in a little sport with the boys there. It proved a good choice. Sport is a big part of the culture and really brings down walls. The place was quiet that day but I got to play 21 with a boy I hadn’t really met before. He was much more relaxed with us after that. Pray I get the opportunity to start going one evening a week or so, more of them are there then and I would like to just go play sports with them.

Currently I am writing this while watching Alannah improve her crawling. She is playing with a little ball and every time she drops it, it rolls of and she has to go get it. She kind of has a sideways crab crawl, almost sitting up. A little bit of normal in the midst of living in a foreign land.

Saturday we continue our lunch ministry at church. One of the students from semiar came. A Paraguayan, Ariel, he went with me up to the favela to invite people for lunch. He was obviously nervous but excited. He told me he had never been inside one before. So I drove into the middle told him to get out, invite people and meet me at the street up above. You can’t really explain what it’s like you just have to see, it is a little group of houses and shacks that people built on once vacant land. You can drive in some places but have to pick your way between houses in others. He lived, and was quite excited. It ended up raining and not to many people made it to the church. This provided another opportunity to go into the favela. One group of kids did come though, Melissa and Fabi were able to go through the wordless book with them and the boy prayed with them and took a bible. Also Nelson a guy that comes every week has started attending the church. God is really working in his life.

We packaged the food into some aluminum dishes called “marmitex” that are used to sell lunches to go here. Melissa and I loaded up the van with Gabriel, a guy who almost made my heart explode in Jiu-jitsu last night read more later, Fabi a girl from church who has been helping a lot and Ariel. We took some to the vacant lot that we went to the week before. We were able to give some food to a few women and again who I think was a pimp. We were even able to pray for Carmen, one of the women who was there. It is really heart breaking, they were all obviously high, even the women who was about 5 months pregnant and living under a bit of plastic.

After that we took some food inside the favela and gave it too three diferent families. It is amazing the difference when you go to someone’s house then when you have them come to the church. They are natural, comfortable, friendly versus shy, nervous and guarded. I really want to spend more effort getting inside and getting to know people. God is capable of offering these kids so much more, He desires to fill them with His Spirit and use them. It is so hard to see families living that way. One very little house had to families crammed into it. Many of the people go out with a push cart and dig recycling out of the trash bins on the street to make a living. After Gabriel and I left one house we came back to find Melissa and Fabi praying for another lady. This was our best day of ministry since we have been here. The closest to what we want. The best part was taking middle class Brazilian and Paraguayan Christians and showing them there is nothing to fear when you are ministering with God.

Sunday was a bit hard. We always seem more homesick on Sundays. Church was good, but it just seems like you always have a hard day after a great day.

Yesterday I (Ben) went to with some guys from church and got together wood to build a rain awning. When it rains you have to walk through a waterfall to get in. We got it framed up in the afternoon but I need to go tomorrow and put the roof panels on.

After that I went and played soccer with the guys again. I actual played well this week. I really hope to start playing twice a week. We also are hoping to get a basketball hoop for the church. Sports here are very important and a huge part of building relationship with people. I am just starting to see that.

After that, Almost 11pm, I went and tried out Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. I don’t know if I will end up liking it or not. I am a natural wrestler but didn’t really no what to do with the guy even when I had position. No one else was hitting anyone so I knew it wasn’t UFC rules, I tried chocking him but he didn’t give up. Then my heart almost exploded and I started to have an asthma problem and quit like a big wuss. I really thought I was going to have a heart attack, what an amazing work out. It re-highlighted my need to be more serious about my health. I went running today, I guess it is time to get in better shape. I don’t want my health to prevent me from sharing the gospel.

One prayer concern is I have been having a lot of problems with insomnia lately. It seems to be effecting my overall health. I haven’t had a normal nights sleep in a couple of weeks now. Also pray for the kids to really get comfortable with Portuguese, especially Moriah. Also pray from Melissa to find more opportunities. She did meet a mom from the school who speaks English and is having some hard things in life.

Back in the saddle/seat

2011-05-09T04:58:00.001-07:00

Wow, how good it is to drive again. I can’t thank everyone who prayed, gave and encouraged us through this process. God is so good. We are excited to see how God uses this new tool to further our ministry.

After our near accident a month ago I woke up burdened to raise the money. Based on what I had been seeing I thought we needed $5,000 to buy a decent car. When we started to look closer we realized that to truly get a car that would meet our needs and bless the Lord we would need much more. We had exceeded our goal and had $6,000 but when I seen this van I knew it was the one the Lord had for us. Unfortunately it was almost $10,000. I knew God didn’t want us to borrow money in Brazil, the interest rates are high. We kept looking and praying. My dad arrived, wanted to see this van and we began to go look. Within an hour of his arrival we received a text that we had the rest of the money and had a deal to buy it. God is amazing.

Saturday, the first day of ministry with a van, I was able to go buy the food for our lunch ministry at church, pick the family up, go get started cooking in the time I normally spend walking to the grocery store. It is so exciting to see how much more we will be able to accomplish now. I made fried cabbage and calabresa, a type of sausage, and my friend Raphael Palazzo made rice with corn and peas. We were a little short handed so I didn’t get to talk to many people but we did give out a lot of food.

The most exciting part was seeing the parents of some kids who come every week finally getting close enough to see the building. The dad was too shy to come all the way onto the property but the mom sat down and ate. Pray for them, I don’t have names at the moment but they have agreed to come to church Wednesday. I plan to pick them up near there house. They live in a small favela and go out with hand pushed carts to dig recycling out of trash for a living.

Also, our church shares a location with a car wash. The people who work there don’t have a lot of money and aren’t paid well. This week several of them finally accepted food. It is amazing how difficult hurt people are to get close too. So guarded, it makes me think how good it is to walk with Christ. It makes me want to work and strive to be an instrument of life and healing instead of hurt and death. The gospel is for today, not just heaven. Life starts now.

After lunch we had a good amount of food left over. Maybe 15 lunches. Melissa, the kids and I took the rest of the food up to a small favela. There is a vacant lot where some people sleep and some apparent drug dealers spend there days. We decided to give them the food. We invite them to lunch every week but they never come. There were 3 or 4 girls there, fairly obviously prostitutes, one of whom was cross-eyed, pregnant and I am pretty sure high on crack. They were shockingly grateful for the food and kind of stormed the van to get it. They were very friendly until I began to invite them to church and tell them where and when. Amazing how that always pushes people away. So clear, the need to be consistent in location and build relationship.

I by no means speak good Portuguese, but oh how good to be able to communicate. I make a lot of mistakes and people don’t always understand me at first, especially the Paraguayan Spanish speakers who came to church last night, but God is giving me the ability to begin sharing His love with people. It makes everything better. With language and a car I feel we can finally begin to do what we have been called to do.

After church last night we gave a ride home to six students from a kind of missions training center. Most of them were Paraguayan. Pray we can connect deeper with this group. Last year we were working with them on Saturdays. Doing children’s ministry in a very poor community just outside of town. It is an exciting ministry to me. People from south America learning Spanish, English, Portuguese, French and studying the bible and ministry techniques. During our little vacation with my parents we went into a small Paraguayan border town. In one of the stores a Paraguayan girl asked me what language my parents and Melissa were speaking to each other. I told her English and she was amazed. She asked what we were doing here. I told her Melissa and I are missionaries and asked if she had a relationship with God. The answer to that is always yes here so you follow up with do you go to church. She said no, Paraguayans believe in God and have some superstitions too but don’t like church. That fits with the semiar students because how cool would it be to develop relationship with the students coming from that country and go on outreaches with them back to there homes to see them come to Christ. One of the students told Heitor and I that he is the only Christian in his family and he lives just on the other side of the river. Hopefully we can see that change.

Some areas for continued prayer

Tim, the pastor of our church feels called to leave Brazil and prepare to go to Asia. He leaves in August. We had been looking at opportunities in other cities but perhaps we should remain here for a time and help the transition to Brazilian leadership.
Also with a car we are seeing ministry open up here but also costs increase. The exchange rate is low and inflation has been high here. We need wisdom as to whether or not to fund raise, look for tent making opportunities or move to a cheaper smaller town. Cities always cost a bit more.
Wisdom in ministry direction. Right now I am beginning to be able to communicate better. We do lunch at the church, I go to a boys prison, have neighbors, and other things. We want to be effective and I think this means we need to pick some areas to minister consistently and frequently.
I am beginning to desire to teach more. I am going to apply myself to more study of God’s word in preparation and perhaps start a video blog/devotional. Pray God would confirm this with opportunities.

God is so good. He is doing a work in us and preparing us to impact many people. I can feel it, I can feel my family growing. I want to remain close to the Lord and walk with Him. Do what He does and see what He sees.

Thank You

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

DOWNLOAD ALL

Appreciation

2011-04-11T07:34:00.001-07:00

I want everyone who prays and supports us to know how much we appreciate you. I grew up in and around missions. I believe most missionaries are worth more support than they get. It is a hard job and you give up a lot of relationships and security to do it. I am not asking for more support, God blesses and takes care of us. Our faith is in Him.

What I want to say is I have also spent 10 years of marriage living the “normal” life. I know that financially speaking it is much more difficult. Month after month going to a job you often don’t love to pay the bills so you can do it again is stressful. Marriage is hard, life leaves you little time for it. Kids are busy with sports and their school always has an event or a conference. We may have to give up some comforts but God gives us an awareness of being secure in Him. I believe it is an extra grace in the midst of giving up a lot.

As a missionary you can get the idea that money comes easy and people at “home” should just step up and help you. You can think of how much easier life would be if you just had a job. Maybe other missionaries won’t relate but I find these to be untrue mental battles I face. I remember being in Ywam before living the normal and struggling more with this. I have met missionaries over the years that don’t understand this. We need to be thankful that we get to live the life we do, to have the pleasure of knowing each day we are working with the Lord.

I think going out as a missionary you have already abandoned yourself to the sovereignty of God. It helps you deal with the insecurity each month wondering if the money you need will come in. I find it is harder to accept I am worth the money then it is to trust God to bring it in.

The truth is we are all missionaries but Melissa and I have the privilege to live on a foreign field. We want to tell all the missionaries in Albany, Kansas City, Boston, Corvallis we love and appreciate you. We know you go every day to jobs in a non Christian environment, you deal with co-workers who live by a different spirit. You deal with the mundane, you sacrifice as much as we do. Thanks for your dedication, your love, your commitment to your community that needs Jesus. Thanks for your witness. Keep going, keep fighting the fight. God is worthy.

You and I both live to the Glory of God. We exist to bring Him pleasure and to have relationship with Him. As we abandon ourselves to Him together I look forward to growing in partnership, growing in communication, growing as a missionary.

I know your money is hard earned and time is precious. We want to be faithful to invest your money in our education. Learning culture, learning language, growing together as a family spiritually so we can be ready for the step that is quickly approaching.

The time is at hand, we are seeking God and I know we are stepping into His purpose and His plans. God is going to use us together to impact the poor and hurting of Brazil one kid, one elderly person, one prisoner at a time. Whatever good we have done is as much a ministry of yours as ours.

Thanks, God bless

Hard day an early blog

2011-04-08T04:43:00.001-07:00

Yesterday was the first truly hard day we have had. I honestly felt like quitting. Maybe that’s a good thing, now maybe God can start using me. We have all been off a bit since returning from Campo Mourao and yesterday seemed to be the culmination of some feelings mixed with some bad experiences. One thing, we almost lost Juliah, Melissa and Daniel would have been seriously hurt. A motorcyclist who wasn’t looking when he pulled out was heading straight for them. My brain froze and I only managed to scream in English, if you know me well you know I never get excited enough to scream.

I think we are nearing the end of our first season and honestly if you look at life finishing well is one thing very few people do. We as people rarely end things on a high note. Most missions boards have you go out for a 3 year term, 1 year language learning (normally a school, but we have learned the term for my style is “barefoot” and it is used) and 2 years of service somewhere. We are about to start the 2 year portion.
We know God is putting it on our heart to engage on a more daily basis the poor and simple people.

Yesterday our heart especially Melissa’s was highlighted once again. A family of Guarani came by asking for food and stuff. It was a lady with 3 kids, one a baby. They were as dirty as could be and without shoes. Melissa couldn’t sleep last night thinking about them. It was a reminder at the end of a hard day, that is why we came, where we are going, why we are learning a new language, why we are going through more paper work, why we ask people for support and how incredibly blessed we are.

My parents are going to be here in just over a week. They have offered to match money for a car up to $2,500. We are content and thankful where we are at but believe it is time to ask for help. In July we will be transitioning from language and culture learners to more full time missionaries. Not having a car has helped us get to know neighbors, been good for health and increased our practice of Portuguese but we are going to need one for more consistent ministry. Walking eats up a lot of time and energy, so does riding the bus.

If you can help with a car please let us know. If you are going to donate through shepherd’s staff tell us how much please. In this case getting cash here with my parents would go a lot further. If we know what donations are going through the shepherd’s staff process we can borrow it or something so my parents can bring it. If you are in the Albany Corvallis area and can give a cash donation in the next week let us know and we will put you in touch with them.

I don’t like asking for money, I much prefer to simply let God do what he will do but He led us to ask before we came and I believe He is asking me to ask now. Please consider this in prayer.

Love you all, we are very blessed and in lack of nothing. This would simply be a freeing step into entering more fruitful ministry and keep our children a bit safer.

Pray as I go to the prison today and tomorrow we have our free lunch at the church again. Pray as in the next couple of months we are looking at a couple opportunities. We think we know where God is leading us but need to wait and see if it comes together over the next month or two. Pray as we think in the 5-10 year range God will lead us to the very far, Tribal South America, Africa who knows.

Ben and Family